LIFE

Hey girl, it’s way hard when there’s a bully like that in your class who gets away with her behavior. Here’s the thing though: Violence is NEVER, NEVER the answer. Take a deep breath. Fight your impulses and keep the peace. Remember that it’s not just you being hurt by this girl; it’s a lot of people. There’s strength in numbers and an adult is the right person to go to for help.

TUNE OUT THE TEASING

First thing’s first: What does this girl do that annoys you? Is she just teasing you? Or is she constantly shoving and pushing people around — both physically and figuratively — to get her way? If she’s just teasing, try to ignore her behavior. For example, if she makes a snide remark about you, say nothing. If she’s kicking you or other people’s chairs, ask her to stop. You may find she’ll stop the behavior on her own when she gets no response or you just ask her to give it a rest.

KEEP YOUR EMOTIONS IN CHECK

It can be super hard to deal with someone who drives you off the edge, but remember, striking back makes you a bully too and can get you into huge trouble. Take the high road here and set the example. Be polite when dealing with her. Stay cool even if her anger gets hot. Composure will go a long way in this case. Be the person you wish she’d be and maybe she’ll take the hint.

WHEN TO TELL AN ADULT

If you’ve tried ignoring her and asking her to stop and she’s still bothering you and your classmates, it’s time to band together and talk to your teach’. This girl is disrupting you and others’ school days and is getting in the way of your learning. Your teacher should know about that and take the appropriate action; keep in mind this girl is a lot more likely to listen to an adult than you and her peers.

If this girl ever becomes violent (i.e. does more than just shove your friend), talk to a guidance counselor or administrator or have a parent call. An adult needs to discipline this girl the moment it gets physical and before someone gets really hurt.

Hang in there and don’t let this girl win. By keeping your cool, you’ll be able to not only put this bully in retirement but to say you took the higher road doing it. Good luck!

check these out!

• "Dear Carol, My parents kept a huge secret from me"
• "Dear Carol, I don't know what to do about my irregular period"
• "Dear Carol, My crush and I like each other, but we're both super shy"
• "Dear Carol, I'm worried about family drama over the holidays"

you might like these

• Tiny ways to express gratitude on Thanksgiving
• "Dear Carol, I can't sleep without listening to audiobooks"
• How to sleigh the holidays as an introvert
• The importance of Giving Tuesday—and how you can make an impact