"Dear Carol, I have major trust issues"
I have really bad trust issues. I don't like to be touched, and it's hard for me to tell somebody I love them. I have trouble talking to and trusting people, especially guys. I've been having flashbacks lately, and I'm scared to tell anybody. It's really dark, and somebody is telling me, "Come on, just one more time. It's not a big deal. Please," and I'm telling them "No." I'm really embarrassed by it, I'm wondering if I should tell somebody or not. I was physically abused once as a kid by a male member of my family, but I don't know if it has anything to do with my trust problems. What's wrong with me?
- Trust Issues
Dear Trust Issues,
No need to feel embarrased, and absolutely nothing is wrong with you. Something is wrong with the family member who abused you, and yes, you are suffering from the repercussions of his criminal behavior. If you can tell your mom and you think she'll listen and believe you, try to open up. A little therapy also would make it easier for you to relax more with boys, although you should never rush to be physical or to say, "I love you." There are many other kids who were taken advantage of when they were too little to defend themselves, and it's time to shine light on these dark memories so that you can face your future with more control and positive feelings. I wish you the best.
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