LIFE

Losing someone’s trust isn’t fun. In fact, it’s typically very, very painful. Whether it’s a parent, a friend or your teacher...it’s hard. You want things to go back to how they were before but it's not that easy. However, that doesn’t mean it has to be gone forever! Sure, there are might be some situations where that happens but in most cases, there are *always* ways to earn back the trust of the person you lost it from, especially if it's your parents. They love and value you and are hurt by your actions, but that doesn’t mean they won’t ever trust you again. Just follow our advice below:

Accept responsibility, and that healing takes time. Don’t just say you’re sorry for it and move on...address it with Mom and Dad and let them work through it in their own time. This may take longer than you’d like, but that’s alright. Remember that this is about them, and if they need a long period of time to accept your apology then that’s what must be done. 

Be open and communicative. Ask your parents what they need in order for this to move forward. If they need space, give them space. If they need you to do certain things that are within reason, then work towards doing them. Don’t make excuses for your behavior, because that will only hurt the relationship that you still have left. By being open, honest and communicative, you're showing maturity. Shutting down or acting out will only make things worse. 

Don’t punish yourself. If you have acknowledged what you’ve done and are taking measurable steps towards changing it, then there is nothing else you can do. Punishing yourself by isolation, or beating yourself up is not going to help. You have to forgive yourself, because if you don’t then you are going to build up a lot of self-resentment inside. Remember that *everyone* makes mistakes (yes, even your parents!). 

Show, don't tell. That means don’t simply say an action...show an action. If you lied to your parents and betrayed their trust, but have apologized and are working towards gaining their trust back, then prove it. Don’t lie about the little things! Hold yourself accountable, and know that mess-ups do happen. If you're really struggling, tell them you’re trying to change yourself, but you’re finding it hard and you’d like their help. Actions really do speak louder than words.

Remind them how much you love them. You want your parents to know how much you appreciate them and how much you value your relationship. Make it a point to be extra grateful and loving while you repair your relationship. However, you don’t want it to come off as disingenuous so make sure to avoid being fake or insincere.

Do you have any experience with gaining trust back from Mom and Dad? Share your advice in the comments!

Photo credit: Fan Pop.

by Kaila L. | 1/29/2017