Dear Carol

"Dear Carol, I'm worried that I'm losing interest in my girlfriend"

Dear Carol,

My girlfriend and I have been dating for almost five months, but recently I’ve been noticing that I’m not as excited and giddy as before. I don’t get butterflies when she texts me or we hang out. (I’m still happy but it’s not that same giddy feeling, you know?) I’m afraid I’m starting to lose interest...or is this a normal feeling to have?

- Losing Interest?

Dear Losing Interest?,

After you’ve dated someone for five months, it makes sense that you won’t feel over-the-top giddy every single time you talk. Happy couples aren’t giddy nonstop. That would be exhausting. So it’s natural not to feel constant butterflies. On the other hand, if you no longer look forward to hanging out or don’t want to hear about what she’s up to, it may be time to part ways or go back to being friends—even if it feels bittersweet. Give this some thought and don’t feel you have to be by each other’s side 24/7. No need to break up simply because you’ve gone from super excited to a calmer happiness. But no need to keep dating if the good feelings have mostly disappeared. Time will help you figure this out.

Carol Weston is the author of 16 books including Speed of Life, her novel (and audiobook) about a 14-year-old girl who writes to an advice columnist. Learn more at, and follow her on Instagram @carolwestonnyc.

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by GL | 2/10/2024