LIFE

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It was the end of the year gallery exhibition for my eighth-grade art class, and we were going around the room sharing how much we felt we’d improved. When the teacher asked me, I answered honestly: “I don’t think I’ve improved very much at all.”

My first drawing, a scribbled portrait of a peer, and my last, a slightly better portrait of a model from a magazine, laid side-by-side on my wooden desk. I’d poured my all into both works, but they looked flat and lifeless compared to the realistic portraits of some of my peers.

The teacher said that art wasn’t for everyone, and I’d probably find something else I enjoyed more. I nodded in agreement, but inside I was crushed that I’d failed at yet another new thing.

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Before art class, I ran track, did competitive cheerleading, qualified for regional spelling bees, sang in the choir and participated in dance and drama clubs, all with varying levels of success. I had yet to find an activity that I could excel at and enjoy at the same time—the one where I wouldn’t be placed in the back *or* bored out of my mind.

In my sophomore year of high school, I moved to a remote area. The closest high school was a private arts academy. Given my previous visual arts, dance, and theater failures, I was reluctant to apply, but my parents encouraged me to give it a shot. After scrolling through the majors, I picked the one I thought would be the best fit: creative writing.

From the moment I finished my first short story, I knew I’d finally found my passion in writing. I felt like I was using my unique skill set for the first time. I’d always loved to read and lose myself in fictional worlds, so creating my own was a natural extension of my hobby.

Receiving a gold medal at the Scholastic Awards in New York.

I ended up attending the school for three years, working on a literary journal, winning a few writing contests, and seeing my work in print. I even had the chance to intern for Girls’ Life.

Not all of us find our passion right away. If, like me, you've gone through a ton of activities without success, I encourage you to keep trying. Keep putting yourself out there. Look at the hobbies you enjoy and see if you can work on the creative side of them. You might be the next Simone Biles or Frida Kahlo, but to find out, you have to run the risk of failure. 

At times, I let myself get discouraged by my lack of improvement. But I knew I’d found my passion when I gained patience for my abilities and a desire to improve. No matter what the output is, I’m doing what I love—and that’s what really counts.

Slider & Post Images Courtesy of Bailey Bujnosek

by Bailey Bujnosek | 8/30/2020