LIFE

Dear Carol,

I am 14 and I go to a small middle school that ends in eighth grade. I have amazing friends, but even the most amazing people can't understand you perfectly. That may be my fault. I tell them so many things, just not the part about me lying when I say I'm not worried or stressed about high school. I'm one of the smart kids—one of those kids who everyone thinks is going to go to one of the top schools in the world. But what stinks about being the smart kid is all of the expectations that get put on you. I realize that there's a big possibility that I'm not going to the best school. I know I might not really be as great as people say. All of my high school applications are in. The wait is nerve-wracking. And today, I just burst. I tripped and fell, hard. I don't think I normally would have cried, but I literally bawled my eyes out. I never thought someone could feel this way and I assumed those who did were just being dramatic. But now I'm one of those people. And I have never felt so alone.

- Stressed About Applications

Dear Stressed About Applications,

You're not alone. Matter of fact, you're in excellent company. Good for you for being a top student. I bet you'll end up at a school that's a good fit for where you'll make more amazing friends. As for crying? Heck, it's part of being alive. I wish I could set you up with a cup of tea and maybe a kitten. I can't. But I can applaud you for being a hard worker and remind you to be honest with your friends. They are no doubt stressing, too, so why pretend with each other? And while I hope you hear from the school of your dreams, don't imagine that you're a lesser person if you don't. You can learn lots and make friends at whatever school you go to. Most of us attended ninth grade at the nearest public school and turned out just fine. Also, you'll be applying for more schools and jobs down the road—this isn't the end of the line. So ease up on the pressure.

Carol Weston is the author of 16 books, including Girltalk, Ava and Pip and Speed of Life, a novel about a 14-year-old girl who writes to an advice columnist. Carol's audiobooks are on Spotify. More at carolweston.com and on Instagram @carolwestonnyc.

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by GL | 1/15/2025