LIFE

Let's face it: We've all been the third wheel before—but there's something uniquely tough about experiencing this sticky sitch in a friendship. When you're stuck following behind your besties (because that sidewalk just isn't big enough for two people), or when "the more the merrier" becomes "three's a crowd," it can be super difficult to know how to deal. Sound familiar? DW, girl—we've got you covered with our top tips.

Invite someone new to hangouts

So maybe your BFF has gotten super close with that girl on her lacrosse team, and they're making plans to head to the mall after school. Or, her study seshes with some AP Chem classmates have turned into weekend trips to the movies or that new escape room. Now, she wants you to tag along—which is awesome, but it's also totally understandable if you're worried you'll be the odd one out. Luckily, this problem has a quick fix! Try inviting another person to these hangouts. That way, you can spend time with the friends you know and love *and* get to know the new people your bestie's been spending time with. Plus, it'll make it way less likely that you feel alone—now, everyone's a part of the group!

Spend time with each person one-on-one

The easiest way to stop feeling like a third wheel? By turning your trio into a twosome, ofc! Whether you're feeling left out of the friend group you've been a part of for years, or your bestie has become friends with someone new, sometimes a little one-on-one time is the perfect solution. Foster your friendships by making time for the ones you already have—or getting to know a potential new friend. 

Change your mindset

The only thing worse than being a third wheel is having a negative attitude about it. It might sound way easier said than done, but changing your mindset can add some much-needed positivity to the situation! So you might not know most of the other guests at your friend's birthday party, but that doesn't mean you can't have fun or make the most of the celebration anyway. (Being the first one on the dance floor when that Harry Styles song comes on? We think yes!) Plus, being a third wheel can def have its own silver linings, too. It's a chance to branch out and meet other people—or, even on a smaller level, to understand what you *don't* want in a friendship and pinpoint the qualities that make someone a better friend. 

Talk to your BFF about it

And ofc, sometimes the best thing to do is simply talk it out. If someone is making you feel like a third wheel, and the situation just isn't getting better, it's OK to approach them about it. After all, your friends may not truly know how you're feeling or how to support you until you reach out. It might be a tough conversation to have, but it will no doubt be worth it.

Ever been a third wheel? Tell us how you dealt with it on Twitter @girlslifemag!

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Slider image: @abbygendell

by Samara Smukler | 5/17/2023