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Friends

How to reach out to friends you haven’t seen in years

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The pandemic has prompted many of us to think about the people we used to spend time with—especially if we lost touch with them well before the shutdowns. Maybe you saw a #tbt of you and a bestie who ended up at a different school, or found the friendship bracelet your childhood neighbor made before you moved. You want to reconnect with them, but you're not sure how. We've got you covered, girl. Here's our advice for reaching out to that friend you haven't seen in years.

Start small

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Unless you guys were super-close, a paragraph is probably *not* the best way to go. You don't want to overwhelm the other person. Instead, start small. A simple 'hey' can open up a line of communication. If you're at a loss for words, react to their story with an emoji or a simple compliment. Then, wait for their reply. If they don't get back to you ASAP, don't sweat it. They may not check their socials often, or they may be busy. Worst case scenario, they don't respond, and you both move on with your lives.

Don't overshare

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Depending on how long it's been since you last saw each other, you might have a lot of news to share. Just be careful not to overshare. The drama you're having with bae and the besties or the bummer of having to repeat a grade is best saved for when you've really gotten back in the loop with each other. Otherwise, you might come off as just wanting to vent, rather than wanting to rekindle your friendship. And remember to have patience. You might not be as in sync as you were before, but there's plenty of time to get to know one another anew.

Draw on the past

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It doesn't hurt to reminisce on old memories—especially if they're unique to you and your pal. Mention how you miss late-night swim practices, or see if either one of you has dug up that time capsule you buried at the local park. This will help you guys get closer faster. You never know what you might've forgotten that your bestie still looks back on with a smile.

Post a throwback

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An easy way to reach out without being too forward is to post a throwback of you and your friend. Tag them in your throwback and if they comment, start a convo from there. If they're more of a private person—or you're not sure if they'd approve of you posting it—DM the pic to them. You can ask if they remember the moment and reflect on the days gone by together.

Accept change

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If your friend doesn't seem the same as when you last saw them, that's because they aren't. You've changed too—even if it doesn't feel like it. A natural part of growing up is growing apart. If reaching out isn't going how you expected, it's okay to go silent again. You don't have to ghost or block your pal, but don't feel pressured to keep up the convo. It might just not be the right time to reconnect.

How do you hang out with your bestie?  Let us know on Twitter @girlslifemag!

Slider Image: Min An/Pexels

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by Bailey Bujnosek | 8/19/2020
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