Tough Stuff

How to come out to friends and family

Pride month is a fantastic time to celebrate identity and love within the Queer community. This year, we are celebrating the 50th anniversarry of the first Pride parade following the Stonewall riots. While Pride is definitely a time to celebrate, we need to address the big, rainbow elephant in the room: Coming out.

Coming out as Queer to cis and straight friends and family members can feel scary and isolating, but it's a really important step in loving and acceping who you are. Keep reading for 4 ways to feel comfortable, empowered and supported when you come out to family and friends.  

1. Accept yourself! This might seem small, but coming out to yourself first is one of the most important steps you can take. Own your Queer identity and be proud of it—it's one of the many things that makes you so special. 

2. Make sure you have a safe space. Find a community of people that you know will support you no matter what. This can be a circle of friends, family members, teachers or anyone in your life who you feel connected to. Sadly, there might be people in your life who will make you feel unsafe or unwanted, so don't waste your time on them. The beautiful, genuine you is too powerful to spend time and energy on people who don't deserve you. The most important thing is that you feel safe, loved and proud. 

3. Come out to one person first. Find one person who you trust and come out to them first. Having even just one ally will make a world of difference. Go to this person if you need anything through the coming out process, and trust that they will have your back. You can even use this ally to help you practice your coming out speech for others in your life.

4. It's not a race. Coming out is deeply personal and something you should only do on your own terms. You can tailor your identity to fit you by trying out different labels or asking your one friend to talk about you using your perfered pronouns for a day. Take your time to figure out what feels right and come out when you feel ready. 

All of these links can provide you with helpful information. If you are in a situation that feels unsafe, you can use these links to get help. 

Happy Pride month! Be proud, stay strong and keep on loving and living.

All GIFs via GIPHY


by Molly Greenwold | 6/17/2020