I guess I'm like any other 13-year-old. I paint my nails, go to the mall, and am very particular about how I dress and wear my hair. I also love to daydream. But what I dream about most is that I will one day be able to walk and talk.

At 8 months old, I was diagnosed with cerebral palsy. CP is a condition caused by damage to part of my brain when I was really tiny. The damage interferes with my brain's ability to control my posture and how I move. I'm unable to speak articulately, but I can make sounds. I communicate by using my left hand on a computerized picture board and by typing with one finger on "intellikeys," which is like a typewriter.

The hardest thing about growing up with CP is seeing other kids do things I can't do. I love soccer and cheerleading, but I'll never be able to participate. I remember watching Bring It On and being upset that I couldn't dance like that. But I can move my shoulders to the music, and I'm grateful for that.

The Big Move
I lived in Tanzania, Africa, until I was 6, but I don't remember much about it. My mom says my needs couldn't be taken care of in Tanzania--there are no wheelchairs or disabled-accessible buildings, no classes for kids like me, no physical therapy, and no special bathrooms or showers. The hospitals are filthy, and patients have to wait days or months for medical attention. Even worse, if something had happened to my parents, I would have become a beggar. Tanzanians believe people with special needs, disabilities or limitations are cursed or have bad spirits inside of them.

My parents wanted to do all they could for me, so we moved to Canada. I love it here in Ontario--there are lots of places that help people like me. But I hate the cold since I'm small and have to wear a lot of clothes to stay warm. Otherwise, I could easily get very ill.

Although I don't recall much about Tanzania, I do remember that nobody played with me. Everyone just stared. My mom had to push me in a stroller or carry me because I couldn't walk. Kids said things to me like, "You're yucky."

When I moved to Canada and got a wheelchair, I truly understood how different I was from other kids. I was happy to be mobile, but it made it so much more obvious. Most kids are very nice, but there are always some who say mean things like, "Oh, look at that big girl drooling!" (another thing I can't control). Maybe they think I don't understand, but I do and it crushes me.

My mom always says, "Some kids are normal, some are like you, and some are worse off than you. Whatever we are, we are. There's no reason to be ashamed because we all come from God, and He knows what's best for us." When she reminds me of that, I feel better.

Standing Tall
At age 10, I started attending a day camp for kids like me and really gained confidence. For the first time, I didn't feel different. That was the greatest feeling. The volunteers and staff made me realize I could do whatever I wanted. That's also when I received my first computer, which made it much easier to communicate. In fact, it changed my life and helped me get stronger as a person.

Even though my life can be pretty hard at times, I hate it when people say, "Poor little girl!" It makes me feel down. What helps is when people encourage me, such as when I do my homework well and they say, "Wow, you did such a good job!" That gives me courage to do more. Between my parents, the day camp staff and people at our church, I get a lot of encouragement. Then, there are my friends--some "normal" and some with special needs. I love hanging with them. We flip through magazines together--my favorite thing to do--for hours, and they do my hair and makeup.

I accept who I am, but I get angry sometimes. Like, when I ask my morn with hand signals for something and she doesn't understand me, I get upset. My mind works quickly, and I want to communicate as fast as I'm thinking but can't. I'm challenged physically, not mentally, but most people don't get that. They assume I'm mentally impaired, but I'm not. That's hard.

I love school so much that I'd go on Saturdays if I could. I've always loved learning and, of course, seeing my friends. But about a year and a half after starting school in Ontario, I had to quit for two major hip surgeries. I was so scared. My hips had dislocated due to improper sitting equipment in Tanzania. I was left with casts on both legs for six months. But my friends visited often, so it wasn't too bad.

Just a Regular Teen
I'm totally into boys. I have a crush on my neighbor (don't tell!), and I can't help smiling when I see him. I can't imagine ever getting married, but I'd love to have a boyfriend someday.

Still, at times I think, "I'm 13, and this is so unfair!" When I feel that way, I don't want to do anything. I pull myself out of the mood by watching a funny movie. Once I laugh, I'm OK.

Most frustrating, though, is having everything done for me. I have to be fed, bathed, dressed and changed every day. Imagine your mom changing you like a baby. It's not fun. But my parents are amazing, so I deal...and try to keep my spirits up.

An Unbreakable Spirit
Helping other kids with hardships really makes me happy. When Hurricane Katrina hit, I had my father send cans of food. I hate seeing anyone suffer. I'd love to be a mentor to kids with special needs. I want to set an example for them, and that's very motivating to me, especially when I feel down.

I want kids to realize that, if you have a disability or illness, you should never give up on fife. Never be ashamed of who you are, and realize you are very special. Never say you can't do something. Always say you can--because you can! My wish to the Make-A-Wish Foundation was to be in GL magazine because all of my favorite actresses are in it. I figured, "Why can't I be in it, too?" And here I am. So you really can do whatever you want to if you put your mind to it.

Even though I can't talk, walk or write, it's amazing that people can still get to know who I am. I have really good eye gestures, and that's how people read me. Maybe since I have something that limits me, I was given other "powers," like a big smile, to make up for it. So even if you are upset or have problems, keep smiling, like I do, and everything will be fine.

By Qyzra Walji as told to Sandy Fertman Ryan

WISHES ARE FREE
Since 1980, the Make-A-Wish Foundation has been granting wishes to children with life-threatening conditions. Kids from 2 1/2 years to 18 years old are eligible. All funding for wishes comes through donations. To learn more, log on to wish.org.

WHAT IS CEREBRAL PALSY?
About half a million people in the United States have CP. The condition can be mild, moderate or severe, so its effects can vary from causing a limp to preventing a person from walking. In more severe cases, kids might have learning disabilities, hearing and vision problems, or even mental impairment. Although there is presently no cure for CP, surgeries, physical therapy, medications and even Botox can sometimes be helpful in treating it. Fortunately, most children with CP live normal life spans and symptoms do not worsen over time.

11/9/2009 7:01:00 AM