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ADVICE | DEAR CAROL

Violence on TV freaks me out

 
My parents watch a bunch of crime shows like Law and Order, NCIS and CSI. I have a feeling they’re affecting me. I imagine violence everywhere. It makes me afraid to go places and fall asleep. I think I need a psychologist. Do you?

 

Dear Traumatized,

I think you need to walk away from the television. Ask your parents to watch these shows in their bedroom or after you’re asleep. Even if they keep watching in the open, you don’t have to. I never watch scary shows—they spook me, too. By the way, real life is nowhere near as dangerous as TV makes it seem. You should be smart and sensible and safety-conscious, but you should not be paranoid. Still worried? Talk over your fears with your school counselor.

 
 

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BY CAROL WESTON ON 1/11/2013 12:00:00 AM

POSTED IN , , ,

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59 Comments | Add Yours
SORT: OLDEST FIRST | NEWEST FIRST
 

OMG this is totally me. I'm convinced people are going to stab me. I can't walk into garage without somebody lol. I'm weird like that. I'm not scared when I'm with somebody, just alone

by Chicwithblondhair101 on 3/9/2013 2:48:00 PM

 
 

I'm normally okay, but my dad watches alot of gory stuff and crime stuff on our projector, and he always has the volume way up, so while i'm in here on the computer, i have to listen to the sound of blood and guts, and gunshots o_o it gets annoying after a while lolz

by mayanunna on 2/8/2013 3:24:24 PM

 
 

that happens to me to, i hate watch scary movies

by aubrey12344 on 1/24/2013 10:47:38 PM

 
 



Mod!
So I have a friend who is depressed and fickle. She is a good person but she's very troubled and has talked about suicide for a while. She thinks hitting people is a good way to greet them and talks about killing people she doesn't like. I have been trying to help her but nothing is working! HELP!

Hey girl, that sounds like some serious stuff.  While it is really great that you've been trying to help your friend, it is definitely not your responsibility to help her work through all her issues.  Encourage her to speak with a guidance counselor at school.  Consult this page for helpful resources.  Also, don't hesitate to speak with an adult you trust about your friend, like a parent or a guidance counselor at school.  


Karin E.

by SuperSpiderSorceress on 1/21/2013 1:21:00 AM

 
 

HELP!! I'm really new here so i don't really know how this whole advice things goes so i'm really really sorry if this isn't the place where you ask for advice about ur own problems... but i REALLY need help!! So i have this guy friend but everyone thinks he is kind of weird because he likes one direction and stuff like that. But recently i've been dreaming about him... like every single night! And i think i might actually be falling in love with him... Does it really matter what other people think though? i was thinking tht maybe we could have a secret relationship but who am i kidding, that never works. please help. Thanks! Smile

by ColoredRain541 on 1/17/2013 8:52:44 PM

 
 



Mod mod mod!
My best friend recently told me a big secret and I don't know if I will be able to treat her the same as before. What should I do?!?!

 

hey! you have to talk to her about your feelings, based on her reaction and how sorry she is, you can re-evaluate your friendship and see if she really is a true pal. 


Helen S.

by Penguins r us on 1/17/2013 6:33:50 PM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD MOD
In response to my other question thanks my icon changed
To the new one thanks Katie L.

 

no prob girl!

xoxo 


Katie L.

by redvelvetluv on 1/16/2013 3:02:34 PM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD MOD
I keep trying to change my icon but whenever I check back
to see if its my new icon its the old one

 

hey girl! when you make changes to your profile, it has to be approved by a moderator. let me see if I can approve yours for ya Smile

xoxo 


Katie L.

by redvelvetluv on 1/16/2013 2:45:51 PM

 
 

hehe my parents do the same thing and it is sometimes scary... I know how you feel

by nsitton on 1/15/2013 5:51:50 PM

 
 

LOL, The random cat in the picture.

by julybaby01 on 1/15/2013 10:01:10 AM

 
 

Hey girls!!!
Come ask to my pofile for advice! I can help with hair, makeup,fashion, friends, school etc. Come ask and I will answer either the day you asked or the next day! I will reply on your profile and if its not publicly visible I will just reply on mine!

by cupcakecutie325 on 1/14/2013 11:26:26 PM

 
 

please join my club "Beauty Tips & Tidbits". i need a vp, secretary, treasurer, and 2 officers to post tips (both fashion and beauty). today's tip is "Spray PAM on wet nails, wipe it off, they're completely dry!"

by alindgren on 1/14/2013 7:02:15 PM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD!!!!!!!I'm so upset. I'm pretty sure that when someone told me that, that guy I used to like was gay I was being lied to as a ploy to get me over him. and now I think he's after some girl.I don't like him anymore but I'm so upset that someone would lie. and yeah were friends we don't even talk in school he dosent even look me in the eye when we pass each other in the hallway.the only we even text is if I text him first and I'm not sure what to do anymore
HELP!!!!!!!




I'm sorry girl, but it doesn't seem like he likes you back. Maybe your friend was trying to protect you from getting hurt! Who really know what either of them are doing, you can only know the real answers if you talk to both of them. Maybe you should talk to your friend first, she may know of something! 
mailyse f.

by ladyinlike on 1/14/2013 3:02:01 PM

 
 

umm i have a question...i dont mean to be racist or whatever but i have a boyfriend and people make fun of us and say "why are u dating him/her..etc."and its because hes white and im black...why do people judge like that? why do people think its wrong for a black person to date a white person? *confused

by JenniferLUV on 1/13/2013 8:41:29 PM

 
 

MOD MOD MOD MOD
My mom wont let me date because she says it will get to my head and my grades wont be good like they are now. I know it wont but she wont believe me. How can I convince her. Thanks. Please reply quickly.

Hey girlie,

I know it's hard, but try to understand where your mom is coming from. She's only saying that stuff because she loves you! You have so many more years to date, and school really is the most important part of your life right now! Maybe you and your mom can reach a compromise, like that you could have a study date with a guy you like. That way you will get to spend time with him while keeping your grades up! Try having a calm conversation with your mom to show your maturity, and don't raise your voice if she says no. And listen to her reasons, because they might be valid! If you can't make a compromise, do your best to respect her decision. You can always bring the topic up again after some time has passed. Good luck!

Meghan D.

by hgrules on 1/12/2013 11:25:12 PM

 
 

This happens to me too. I would not watch it but I hve to sit with my dad for a little while before I can fall asleep.

by hgrules on 1/12/2013 7:59:05 PM

 
 

MOD! MOD! MOD! MOD! MOD! MOD! MOD!
I really love GirlsLife. It never disappoints. The articles are up to date, not to mention super helpful! The MODs are amazing too! And don't get me started on the giveaways! I love this website, it's super safe and fun! <3

Smile

by WinnieGirlie on 1/12/2013 7:21:30 PM

 
 

nod mod mod
okay so im really mad at my bus driver
so me and my friends were being too loud so the bus driver said to me "ill go to your house and talk to your mom if you dont be quiet"
well we got in trouble again and he said the same thing i think its really sexist is it or am i over thinking
p.s. he's 79 if that helps

Hey girlie,

I don't think that sounds sexist at all! Bus drivers have a right to ask their passengers to follow the bus rules, including maintaining an appropriate noise level. He was saying that as a warning for you to be quiet, so try to be more respectful of him and the other passengers on your school bus next time you ride to school. Then he won't have to talk to your mom and everyone will enjoy the ride more! I would also thank him for the ride when you get off at your stop because that would probably make him happy and would show that you appreciate what he's doing for you Smile

Meghan D.

by PlushPurplePanda on 1/12/2013 7:18:34 PM

 
 

Let's just take a moment to enjoy that random cat in the picture...

by LovePeaceHope on 1/12/2013 7:07:52 PM

 
 

Just stop watching them, I think its like anything else we watch, the more you watch it the more you think about it. I think some of the stuff they show is very gross, that is why I dont watch it all the time. I would rather watch something with hot guys in it than violence.

by fashionqn on 1/12/2013 4:12:30 PM

 
 



Mod Mod Mod!
I keep this journal which i write down almost every single thing in my day, good or bad. But my older sister some how finds where i hid it and reads it. I've asked her to stop and even told my parents, but she doesn't give up! Writing how my day went helps me learn what i did wrong or right. How can i get her to stop reading my journal?

 

hey! if she absolutely won't stop, keep another journal and don't tell anyone about it, once she thinks you're not writing in your old one she may lose interest. good luck! 


Helen S.

by pretty_princess1024 on 1/12/2013 3:37:00 PM

 
 

Hey Girls, do you want advice right away? Check out my advice queen page: dragonsrox1000. I check pretty much every day, but I just started so I don't have any fans. Frown I have boy experience, I'm a dancer, and I'm a freshman in high school. Thanks!

by dragonsrox1000 on 1/12/2013 3:19:19 PM

 
 

I am the same way with TV. Things I watch can really mess me up and find their way into my head in the worst way. So I make sure to only watch things that I'm going to be fine with having in my head and wont freak me out later..you should try that. It's hard at first but then you realize how much happier you are without so many bad images and ideas in your head

by maggie183 on 1/12/2013 12:39:42 PM

 
 

That happened to me too, i just stopped watching it.

by Chrissy23 on 1/11/2013 10:58:58 PM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD!!!
This has nothing to do with this topic btw. Okay so there's this boy I am in
L-O-V-E in. I only get to see him once a week on Monday's though :.( *sniff.* He's 2 years older than me, but I know people who are 5 years apart, so I don't think it's thattt bad. Anyways, my bday is in April & I really want him to go. He has an older brother who is 3 years older than me. I don't have his number, and I feel weird asking him... because we aren't that close. My mom & his mom are like friends. How can I get him to come to my bday? I don't wanna make things awkward when I see him again... Any ideas?

Hey girlie,

Two years doesn't sound like too much of a difference, but it can be a lot when you're younger! If you want him to come to your birthday party, that's not awkward since there will be other people there. You don't have to ask him as a date! And if you're friends, it won't be awkward to ask for his number as friends! 


Meghan D.

by neonroxursox on 1/11/2013 10:43:08 PM

 
 



mod mod mod what are some good writers?

Hey girlie,

Check out our book club channel for tons of reading suggestions we heart! http://www.girlslife.com/category/book-club.aspx 
Meghan D.

by StrawberryPatchKid on 1/11/2013 10:09:10 PM

 
 



mod mod mod i am trying to be healthier any tips?

Hey girlie,

Check out our health & fitness channel for tons of great ideas on workouts and healthy eating/recipes! http://www.girlslife.com/category/health-and-fitness.aspx 


Meghan D.

by StrawberryPatchKid on 1/11/2013 10:08:05 PM

 
 



mod mod mod any ideas outfits to wear to a party sunday? I have a blue mini dress I was thinking of wearing, would black leather boots go well with it?

Hey girlie,

That sounds like a really cute outfit! Have fun at the party Smile 


Meghan D.

by StrawberryPatchKid on 1/11/2013 10:05:54 PM

 
 

Hehe that happend to me but I got over it. That stuff rarely ever happens. Just think of all the other things you like.

by cookiebk on 1/11/2013 10:05:12 PM

 
 



mod mod mod whats public school like? I have never been

Hey girlie,

It is just where you take classes with other people (like your friends!), and there are after school clubs you can join, too. I would talk to your friends where you live to see what the schools near you are like! 


Meghan D.

by StrawberryPatchKid on 1/11/2013 9:49:22 PM

 
 

URG! I COMPLETLYY agree with this!!

by yorkielover88 on 1/11/2013 9:48:59 PM

 
 



mod mod mod I've had to miss out on lots of fun experiences ): how can I cope?

Hey girlie,

No one can do everything, and there will be tons more fun experiences in the future for you to take part in! Try focusing on having fun with your friends now instead of dwelling on the past! 


Meghan D.

by StrawberryPatchKid on 1/11/2013 9:45:54 PM

 
 



mod mod mod is it true sugar helps make your lips soft?

Hey girl,

I think sugar would exfoliate your lips, which would make them softer after you wash the sugar off! You could also use a lip scrub. Don't forget to moisturize your lips with a lip balm afterward! 


Meghan D.

by StrawberryPatchKid on 1/11/2013 9:38:17 PM

 
 



mod mod mod whats some good hard rock bands?

Hey girlie,

Check out this post on a rock band we love, and browse our entertainment channel for more awesome music selections Smile http://www.girlslife.com/post/2011/10/17/Finally-A-rock-band-just-for-the-girls.aspx?cp=all 


Meghan D.

by StrawberryPatchKid on 1/11/2013 9:36:27 PM

 
 



mod mod mod whats a good dark eye look?

Hey girlie,



Meghan D.

by StrawberryPatchKid on 1/11/2013 9:35:32 PM

 
 



mod mod mod by confused I meant, I feel confused about how certain situations make me feel and its a jumbled up mess. there's not really anyone I can trust to talk to about it.

Hey girl,

That link has resources and hotlines where you can speak with professionals toll-free, and your school guidance counselor should also have a confidentiality policy, so you can trust them to keep whatever you speak to them about private! 


Meghan D.

by StrawberryPatchKid on 1/11/2013 9:34:48 PM

 
 



mod mod mod 

Hey girlie,

If you are dealing with family issues, you should speak with a trusted adult like a guidance counselor or doctor who is outside of your fam and will keep what you tell them confidential. They will be able to help you work out what you're going through! Check out this article for more help: http://www.girlslife.com/post/2008/08/04/HELP!2.aspx 



Meghan D. Meghan D.

by StrawberryPatchKid on 1/11/2013 9:33:19 PM

 
 



mod mod mod i'm homeschooled and so far there are no homeschool dances in my area this year ): how can i deal?

Hey girlie,

It's totally not the end of the world to not have school dances! Maybe you could get some other homeschool kids in your area to go bowling or to the movies so that you could still have fun with them and get to know them! 


Meghan D.

by StrawberryPatchKid on 1/11/2013 9:28:02 PM

 
 



mod mod mod HIDE THIS
how can u deal with coming off painkillers and having lack of sleep? i'm using a relaxing tea already, other ideas?

Hey girl,

I would try not looking at a screen (computer, TV, phone) or having sugary snacks a few hours before bed, but I would talk to your doctor since they prescribed the painkiller and will be able to give you better advice than I can! 


Meghan D.

by StrawberryPatchKid on 1/11/2013 9:25:05 PM

 
 



mod mod mod i feel really confused

Hey girl,

Because we only wish the best for you, it's important that you speak with a trusted adult about how you're feeling. That could be a parent, guidance counselor, doctor or other older family member. They can help you with what you're going through! For additional resources, check out this link:  http://www.girlslife.com/post/2008/08/04/HELP!2.aspx


Meghan D.

by StrawberryPatchKid on 1/11/2013 9:23:37 PM

 
 



mod mod mod what are some good party foods to feed about thirty?

Hey girlie,

Check out our recipe section for tons of great food ideas you could use at a party! http://www.girlslife.com/category/healthy-recipes.aspx 


Meghan D.

by StrawberryPatchKid on 1/11/2013 9:20:54 PM

 
 



mod mod mod about how many 10% alcohol drinks does it take to reach the legal limit?

Hey girlie,

The legal limit on alcohol for anyone under 21 is zero, so don't take a chance with the law and your health! Enjoy being young, and your 21st birthday will be there when you're ready. 


Meghan D.

by StrawberryPatchKid on 1/11/2013 9:19:34 PM

 
 



mod mod mod what are ways to control rage?

Hey girl,

Check out this post on handling anger, and I would talk to your parents or guidance counselor about what you're going through, because they can help you and listen to everything you're dealing with! http://www.girlslife.com/post/2009/12/16/teen-anger-issues.aspx?cp=all&s=n 


Meghan D.

by StrawberryPatchKid on 1/11/2013 9:18:50 PM

 
 



mod mod mod sometimes my thighs and chest randomly turn red is this bad?

Hey girl,

I'm not sure, it might be nothing but I would talk to your parents, school nurse or doctor to make sure everything's okay! 


Meghan D.

by StrawberryPatchKid on 1/11/2013 9:18:25 PM

 
 




MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD i have wierd pimples and cuts on my elbows and because if it i hate wearing short sleeve shirts .how can i get smooth and clear skin without haveing the teptation

 

Hey jadarocks2401, try using a pumice stone instead of a wash rag on your elbows with exfoliating body wash. Hope that helps! Xoxo


Lynae P.

by jadarocks2401 on 1/11/2013 8:30:38 PM

 
 

lol i like the cat in the pic

by ColosalMascara on 1/11/2013 8:07:54 PM

 
 

You could go shopping, see a movie, have a skate party, have a sleepover with your girls, or go out to eat. Smile Xoxo Lynae P.

by StrawberryPatchKid on 1/11/2013 7:43:50 PM

 
 



mod mod mod mod hide this is it bad to be angry at people who have passed away because they did bad things to you but, you still loved them?

 

Nope not at all.  


Lynae P.

by StrawberryPatchKid on 1/11/2013 7:37:00 PM

 
 



mod mod mod yes for any subject

 

Scavenger hunts, writing reports comparing movie versions to book versions, writing a paper on a topic of your choice, and taking a trip to a museum could be fun. Hope these help! Xoxo


Lynae P.

by StrawberryPatchKid on 1/11/2013 7:35:27 PM

 
 



mod mod mod can people really get possessed?

 

Hey StrawberryPatchKid, no that can't really happen. Xoxo 


Lynae P.

by StrawberryPatchKid on 1/11/2013 7:34:57 PM

 
 



mod mod mod hide this i barely ever sleep and I'm trying to stop using pills in general as i've had issues with them, i've sort of been a pill popper most of my young life but, now I'm trying to stop and it makes sleep difficult can you give me tips on ways to relax? thanks. my parent let me get chamamile tea and i've been drinking it. I also listen to music softly. any more ideas?

 

Hey StrawberryPatchKId, you could always try meditating. I've found that really helps me relax. You could even try laying down with the lights dimmed and your eyes closed, and imaging a place you'd like to be. For example, if you like beaches, imagine being on the beach when it's really pretty outside laying beneath the sun. Hope this helps! Xoxo 


Lynae P.

by StrawberryPatchKid on 1/11/2013 7:33:19 PM

 
 



Mod mod mod could you suggest some easy yet interesting homeschooling assignments?

 

Hey StrawberryPatchKid, can these be assignments for any subject? Xoxo 


Lynae P.

by StrawberryPatchKid on 1/11/2013 7:30:24 PM

 
 

Join my club: It's all about Fashion and Beauty, there will be an outfit of the day and a tip of the day, well everyday!!!! all of the positions are currently open just comment and ask if you want a position and I will send an application to your profile page(: thanks so much!!!

by nazirah817 on 1/11/2013 7:15:22 PM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD
What are some clean songs other than Taylor Swift and One Direction to help get over a guy I never dated? I already looked at the single girl playlist. Thanks MOD!




Try Kelly Clarkson, Avril Lavigne, Adele, Christinia Perri, and Jason Mraz 
mailyse f.

by teampeetapercy on 1/11/2013 4:19:41 PM

 
 


Mod mod mod
I have my first date this weekend. And it is to a sports mall. I do sports and enjoy them. I am kind of shy when it comes to talking to boys face to face, but for some reason in texting I'm fine! This guy and I send hearts to eat other etc. but tomorrow when I see him I'm afraid ill choke and won't know what to say. He's supposed to meet my parents. I'm scared ill get embarrassed and won't say anything during the date. Can you give me some tips so I won't choke and make a fool out of myself in front of him? Haha thanks! mailyse f.

by Ljbdaisy on 1/11/2013 12:43:50 PM

 
 

I'm quite the opposite actually, I love those type of shows. Smile
But they're just meant for entertainment, and a lot of times people get captivated by crime and mystery, so that's why they focus on those things! But just keep in mind that real life isn't as dramatic as the shows portray. I agree, step away from the TV, and if it helps maybe bring a friend along with you wherever you're going - I'm sure it'll help get your mind off things. Smile

by XxTeddy_BearXx on 1/11/2013 12:18:47 PM

 
 

If she gets affected by those shows, I hope she will never see the Walking Dead! Lol.

by Chloe<3 on 1/11/2013 11:35:37 AM

 
 



Mod mod mod
I have my first date this weekend. And it is to a sports mall. I do sports and enjoy them. I am kind of shy when it comes to talking to boys face to face, but for some reason in texting I'm fine! This guy and I send hearts to eat other etc. but tomorrow when I see him I'm afraid ill choke and won't know what to say. He's supposed to meet my parents. I'm scared ill get embarrassed and won't say anything during the date. Can you give me some tips so I won't choke and make a fool out of myself in front of him? Haha thanks!




This is very common! Make sure to...

- Not look/sound nervous...just relax.

- Carry a conversation (ask him about his family, friends and activities).

- Don't talk too much, make sure you let him talk too!

- Be confident!



mailyse f.

by Ljbdaisy on 1/11/2013 8:17:59 AM

 
 

Don't watch it. If your parents are watching a scary movie or show, don't be compelled to watch it and later tell GL that you're having nightmares. By the way, is there an article to getting rid of nightmares?

by transform2314 on 1/11/2013 1:44:13 AM

 
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