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ADVICE | DEAR CAROL

I gossiped online about a bud--but I want to take it all back!

 
To get revenge on one of my friends, I made a gossip blog last week and pretended to be a girl with a different name. I never told her because the next day we made up. But just the other day, she found it and started showing it to people. She thought it was me, but I denied it because I didn’t want us to fight again. I deleted the website today, but I’m still afraid everyone will find out

 

Dear Bad Blogger,

I hope the whole thing blows over, but I also hope you learned that revenge is a rotten road and that being mean to friends is low low low. If she finds out, apologize profusely and say that you were an immature idiot and that you feel horrible and are wiser now. If she does not find out, even better. In the future, if you want distance from someone, take a step back rather than plunging into attack mode.
 
 

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BY CAROL WESTON ON 12/7/2012 4:16:00 PM

POSTED IN , , , ,

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35 Comments | Add Yours
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Hey!
I want to buy stuff like make-up and bras, and other girly things, but I don't want my sister to come around.
She's really harsh and embarrasses me by talking loudly about my bra size, that my hair is ugly and I NEED a certain type of makeup or people won't like me.
I know she doesn't mean to be harsh, but how do I go with out her and without her being offended?

 

 

Hey Girl, talk to your Mom about it in private and tell her that you want to go separately. She will understand. If not, get a group of friends to go. It's so much fun to go with friends and then you can tell your sister that it's something you've gotta do with them without hurting her feelings.

 

Hannah H. 


Hannah H.

by raindropsonroses on 1/15/2013 4:34:18 PM

 
 

where can I submit something like this?

by raindropsonroses on 1/15/2013 4:30:54 PM

 
 

MOD MOD MOD!!!
Ok so I really like me BGF. But he just got out of a relationship and is really upset about it. I want to up the flirt level with him... But is it too soon? Please help!

Hey girlie,

There is no set time when it is okay to flirt with someone after they get out of a relationship, so try to play it by ear and base your actions on how he's feeling! Since he's upset now, he probably needs you as a friend to be there for him, not to be flirting with him. Try doing fun stuff with him as friends, like going bowling or skating, to get his mind off the breakup and cheer him up. After he's been single for a little while and not talking about the breakup as much, you could start dropping hints that you like him!

Meghan D.

by surferchickemp on 1/12/2013 9:25:44 PM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD!
My hair is really straight but when I wake up no matter how long I brush my hair it always retains a bit of frizz can you please help MOD thnx!!!!

Hey girlie,

Maybe you could try using hairspray or a frizz smoothing serum when you are doing your hair in the morning, or try a frizz controlling conditioner when you take a shower! 


Meghan D.

by AwesomeAmber on 1/11/2013 11:17:59 PM

 
 

Wow a lot of negative comments from this, but hey, we're all human and we learn from trial and error, right? Try to support instead of make her feel bad... I'm sure plenty of people have gotten revenge WAAAAAAAAAY worse than this.

by cdd323 on 12/27/2012 5:25:17 PM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD!!!
Not to be rude, but why isn't poop your thing?

 

Just isn't. I'm more interested in reading. Xoxo 


Lynae P.

by Poophead234 on 12/21/2012 6:51:52 PM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD!!
Thank you for getting back to my problem!!! Do you like poop? Thanks!

 

Hey Poophead234, no, poop isn't really my thing lol. Xoxo 


Lynae P.

by Poophead234 on 12/21/2012 6:10:35 PM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD!!!!!
This might sound weird but I love.. poop. I get annoyed when people think I'm weird because of my interest. As you can see, my username has to do with poop because I love it so much! My mom might think I might need a therapist because of how much I love poop. What should I do? I'm just so conflicted, that maybe I should stop loving poop? Please help mod!!

 

Hey Poophead234, you like what you like. Don't change who you are for anyone. Smile Xoxo 


Lynae P.

by Poophead234 on 12/21/2012 1:55:51 PM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD!
Thanks for getting back so fast. My mom's not home yet but I will talk to her as soon as she gets back. I found out that there is a button on her google profile that says REPORT. One of the things you can report is impersonation. I'm not going to report it without my moms permission but do you think its a good idea? I really, really, don't want to have to deal with the police, especially since this is a totally random person

 

 

That is definitely a good idea. But write down the info just in case and after you report them email someone running the site to ask for confirmation.

Hannah H. 


Hannah H.

by WashingtonGirlie13 on 12/18/2012 1:47:59 PM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD!!! PLEASE HELP!
Okay its gonna sound weird but I googled myself just for fun and found a bunch of of photos of myself. That part wasnt creepy because my sisters and I took them with a professional photographer, so of course they'd be on her website and online. What I DID find creepy was this: One of the photos was edited with hearts around it and I didn't know who had edited it so I clicked it and found that someone is using MY picture as THEIR google profile picture!!!! There's a bunch of pictures of my sisters and I on her profile and she's like, "Aren't I SO cute?" and "Aren't my sisters adorable? They're 8 and 9" which isn;t even the age of my sisters. This is so creepy I can't even stand it. I cant believe that some random person downloaded a picture of me and claimed it to be herself. Worse, all the comments on the photos are "Oh, so cute!" and stuff. WHAT am I supposed to do? Is that legal?

 

 

 

 

Hey, Girl. That is freaky, but it isn't illegal. Remember you had to download a picture off the internet for your profile here. However, if they are impersonating you which is what it sounds like, it can be very bad for you (in the future) and them. It's hard to track down the real person behind it so definitely talk to your parents about what to do and consider informing the police.

Hannah H. 


Hannah H.

by WashingtonGirlie13 on 12/18/2012 1:25:13 PM

 
 

MOD MOD MOD
Okay thanks I will tell her in private and in person, but should I bring something? My mom wants me to bring diapers but I really don't want to! I have plastic sheets on my bed

Hey girl,

I would listen to your mom since she knows what to do. Your friends won't be able to see it under your pajamas anyway--they won't even know you're wearing it!

Meghan D.

by hinatagal on 12/14/2012 10:26:02 PM

 
 

MOD MOD MOD
What if she makes fun of me?

Hey girl,

I'm sure she won't make fun of you if she's your friend, it's not something you can control!

Meghan D.

by hinatagal on 12/14/2012 10:07:03 PM

 
 

MOD MOD MOD
But I really can't tell her, she wouldn't know what to do about it anyway and my moms making me go.

Hey girl,

I would at least tell her so that she is aware of it before you get there. If your mom is making you go, you could also ask your mom to talk to her mom for you.

Meghan D.

by hinatagal on 12/14/2012 9:58:31 PM

 
 

MOD MOD MOD
I wet the bed and I have to go to my friends sleepover tommarow please HELP I cannot tell her!

Hey girl,

I know it might be awkward, but it sounds like you really need to tell her if you're going to be spending the night. You could also talk to her mom if that would be easier, but either way you should let her know!

Meghan D.

by hinatagal on 12/14/2012 9:48:11 PM

 
 

i see where you are coming from. me? i would probably do the same thing. but just know that revenge is not the thing that you should do. you shouldnt hope she doesnt find out. you should tell her. she would probably be less upset if she knows you were being honest. if she is really your friend she will forgive you. just know, ~trust is like a piece of paper. once its crumpled it will never be perfect.~

by pupa413 on 12/14/2012 2:43:39 PM

 
 

out of experience I think your best interest is to tell your friend...I know that probably seems horrifying and scary, and your probably worried you will fight... but by being honest you'll become closer...tell her you love having her as a friend and that you don't want to lose her as a friend and that what you did was low but hope that you can remain friends...thats my advice good luck girlie!
-bailey

by Bailey72 on 12/13/2012 7:13:00 PM

 
 

i dont mean to be rude but wow thats the lowest of the low and this isnt all the best advice "if your friend finds out its you say sorry, if she doesnt all is good" would you have liked if she did this to you? because that might be coming right back at you if she did this to you you would want her to tell you it was me sorry i really hope you forgive me but i tottaly understand if you dont, you wouldnt want her to hide it from you and so you shouldnt hide it from her

by kyleigh1234 on 12/12/2012 11:11:21 AM

 
 

I live in this really hard situation where I have to move COUNTRY and/or SCHOOL every few years. I recently moved to the United States and I'm now going to an international school. I'm so excited to be here but then my mom breaks the news and says that I would have to go to an American public school. And that's when I got really scared because in movies there were a lot of bullying and I think that they'll all be smarter than I am. That or I have to move back to my home country, Malaysia. I want to go to the public school because I want to make my mom happy in my studies and earn a scholarship to high school and college, but that would mean that I would feel uncomfortable. If I move to Malaysia, ill feel so happy but then ill be far away from my family in the states. I'm at the point where I only have my friends to rely on. It's just too complicated. My friends say I'm lucky but I would trade with anything just to have a one home and school life.

by nurainamaisarah on 12/11/2012 11:40:31 PM

 
 



Mod Mod Mod!!!
The counselers at my school are really great. But i completely hate them. Last year, my brother was acused of bullying and the counselors are the people who do the investigaiton. This whole investigation went on for a couple months and it really made my family's life really hard for those months. My friends are comfortable talking to them and say that I should try talking to the counselors when I'm upset, but i cant. How do i get through this?

 

hey! I know that must be hard for you. Authority figures should be trustworthy, but how do we cope when we feel betrayed or persecuted by someone with power? We confront them. Not in a disrespectful way, but if you do feel the need to talk to one of these counselors, this is the first thing you should tell them. Counselors' jobs are to promote and encourage honesty, so they will want you to be frank with them. You'll feel better too, when you hear their side of the story and they hear yours.  


Helen S.

by PandaLover0330 on 12/8/2012 2:51:48 PM

 
 

What? The advice says "if she finds out" apologize. "If she doesn't, all the better." NO! You apologize anyway! If you don't you are deceiving her--you already lied! If she find out, she will be even more mad than before! No offense, but this advice is awful!

by awesomegirl4everandalways on 12/8/2012 2:47:29 PM

 
 



MODMODMOD ! 'm Christian, and one of my close friends is Jewish. Her bah mitzvah is coming up, and I'm totally going because it's such a big part of her life. How do I act though? I want to be as supportive as I can, but don't know what to say/do. Any help? Thanks (:

 

Hey girl, that's nice of you! They have different activities I believe, and there is absolutely nothing wrong with you participating in them Smile So just go, have fun, and be with your friend! 


lauren r.

by kenzi143 on 12/8/2012 9:51:22 AM

 
 

Hey Girls! Join Legit Boy Advice!

This is a LEGIT club about boy advice. Any questions you have let me know because guess what?! I have 5 brothers and I have each age group of boys that you will have questions for (about ANYTHING)get REAL answers from REAL BOYS themselves! All you have to do is include your age and question and I'll get right too it!

by Chloe<3 on 12/8/2012 12:20:53 AM

 
 



mod mod mod
so i was really good friends with this guy in my class until my brother told him that i like him, which i dont, only as a friend. so now he kinda hates me. so my friend told him that it want true but she said that he was relieved so im hoping that he isnt still mad. BUTTTTTT we are doing a play for school and we are married and hes really mad and he wants to quit the show! my brother is also in the show and he is probably gonna mess up our friendship AGAIN! Frown so what should i do to make him shut up and to let the guy know that i only want to be friends with him?
another thing, for the play i have to sing a song all by myself and my voice sounds horrible on mic so how can i get the guts to sing and how can i do well?
thanks moddy!!!!!!




Hey girl! As far as the boy situation goes, I think they only way to let him know you just want to be friends is to just tell him. It might be a little akward, but just pull him aside one day and let him know you think he's great but only as a friend. Tell him to ignore your brother and that you hope you guys can be cool. Hopefully he will follow your lead! And the solo? Just know you got the part for a reason and give it all you got! You'll be great! Break a leg! 

xo 
Taeler L.

by Carrie_Underwood on 12/7/2012 11:38:26 PM

 
 

This is a bigger problem then we think, we all want to say something bad about another classmate at least once and this girl just went too far. When you get tempted just ask yourself if you would want it happening to you.
Someone told me about a girl at a school recently where they put a picture of her face on another persons posing naked body and spread them all around school, that is just terrible. We have to be better than that.

by fashionqn on 12/7/2012 10:46:29 PM

 
 



mod mod mod
my friend was listening to one direction and her mom didnt like the song that she was listening to and her mom told my mom all of these lies about the band and now my mom hates it. its really annoying cause my frined's mom is really judgemental so yeah. help me




Hey girl! Bummer! Try telling you mom some better things about the band and maybe asking her to listen to a few songs with you. She might come around and form her own opinion of the group! 

xo 
Taeler L.

by Carrie_Underwood on 12/7/2012 10:37:31 PM

 
 



mod mod mod
what do you do if there is a clingy girl that is only nice to you and nobody else just that you can be her friend?




Hey girl! Be nice back and find a way to let her know she should be nicer to others. Lead by example and maybe you can be a good influence on her to make others feel included. Good luck! 

xo 
Taeler L.

by Carrie_Underwood on 12/7/2012 10:34:32 PM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD
My friend is coming over this weekend, and I really want us to have a good time and not be bored. PLEASE give me ideas on what we can do! Thank you.




Hey girl! You could grab some movies you both have been dying to see and make a marathon of it. Pop some popcorn, grab a few sweets and make it a real event. Rate them like movie critics after and have a great time comparing what you both liked or didn't. Have fun! 

xo 
Taeler L.

by LovePeaceHope on 12/7/2012 10:19:53 PM

 
 

Wow low low low low

by hgrules on 12/7/2012 9:46:13 PM

 
 



Mod Mod Mod
So I got into a fight with my friend because she likes s bad boy. She thinks she can change him but I know you can't change a person like him. I liked his brother and they are the same in how they act. I knew I couldn't change him. But no matter what I say to her she gets mad at me. I just don't want her to get hurt. He is the type to only like the girls that look perfect and she is more a nerd. So she put a note in his locker and I was telling her its just a waste and that he wasn't gonna read it cause the note was telling him to change what he does. And I started telling her that he wasn't a good person and she will get hurt. She didn't listen and got mad and she used my secrets against me and she used his brother as an example which was hurt the worst. I then ignored her because she had no right to use my secrets against me. We made up but I'm still mad I forgave her cause she was my only best friend. Anymore she just makes me mad and I don't know what to do. Help!




Hey girl! Unfortunately, there is probably not a ton you can do now. You're a good friend to warn her and let her know you're worried about the outcome. Hopefully she will take your advice, but sounds like she is still going to act on her feelings. The best way for her to learn may be to get her heart broken a little. Just remember to still be there for her if that happens! Good luck! 




xoxo

Taeler  
Taeler L.

by HockeyLuver on 12/7/2012 9:31:41 PM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD MOD
i have a friend problem. my friend (lets call her J) and i like to kinda play around, like i chase her outside and she chases me. We don't hurt each other. then one day she was like, "my mom says i cant hang out with you anymore if you chase me around. i got muddy and it ruined my new boots and jeans" and she said it in front of all my friends and it was really embarrassing. they were all like, "you cant do that anymore its really mean and you ruined her boots." i was really embarrassed and i wanted to say that she does it too and she always laughs when i do it but i couldn't. now i'm embarrassed to talk to her and she just ignores me. i really don't want to talk to her. its pulling apart our little "group" of friends.what should i do?




Hey girl! Tricky situation. For the sake of your mutual friends though, I think talking it out might be the best way to go. Pull her aside one day soon and just ask if there is anything you can to repair the friendship. It certainly isn't your fault, but taking the high road might be the easiest way to ease tension. Good luck! 




xoxo

Taeler  
Taeler L.

by mddreams123 on 12/7/2012 7:45:02 PM

 
 

Well, I did something like that twice today. Frown

by wesdelwarrior on 12/7/2012 6:32:04 PM

 
 



MODMODMODMOD
So a while ago, me and a friend (let's call her D) got in a fight. My other friend Kiss has since then been trying to tell me that D didn't want to be my friend, so that I should stop trying. I had just been passing it off as another of K's lies. So, at lunch today, I told K that I'd be sitting with D at lunch, and she told me not to. Then she told D and D's friends (B and C) and they were whispering about me, and I realized K had been telling the truth. So, I went back to sit with K, E, M and G, crying. Everyone was so nice to me, even the two new guys, N and R, who I barely knew. I'm still upset, though, but D doesn't know I'm mad. What do I do?

 

Hey JBgal33, I think you should talk to D. Although she said these things about you, you guys were friends at one point in time. So even if you two decide to end things, at least make it an official and friendly ending. Hope this helps! Xoxo





Lynae P.

by JBgal33♥ on 12/7/2012 6:25:34 PM

 
 

What if she were reading this NOW?

by nilimamd on 12/7/2012 6:01:41 PM

 
 

OMG low low low :p

by punky99 on 12/7/2012 5:27:59 PM

 
 

Wow :o I would never imagine doing that to anyone.

by YouCanCallMeCat on 12/7/2012 4:27:10 PM

 
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