LIFE

 

Bullying is no joke. It's mean, hurtful and all around a terrible thing. And it's *especially* hard to see it happening to one of your friends. If you find yourself in that sitch, it can be tough to know what exactly you should do but usually, you know that taking action in any way, instead of just being a bystander, is what's most important.

But what if your friend doesn't want your help? What if she asks you to just "let it go?" Should you? We help you decide below.

Let her know that you're there for her. She might not be ready to talk about it yet or get help, but it can help to know she has someone when she's ready. Tell her that she can come to you anytime, no matter what.  

Check in often. Saying "I'm here for you" once and then never mentioning the sitch again isn't too helpful. She may feel awkward or uncomfortable being the one to bring up the bullying in conversation so it's up to you to keep making sure she's okay. You don't have to force her to open up but sometimes even a simple "How are you doing today?" can initiate a convo.  

Don't judge her or get angry. Even if you're frustrated that she won't stand up for herself or get help, yelling at her or being mean is only going to make matters worse. Way worse. Being the victim of a bully can really mess with your self esteem and confidence so keep that in mind when you're annoyed at how "weak" she is being. The best thing you can do is love her and support her in any way she will let you. 

Encourage her to get help. While you don't want to pressure your friend or lecture her, you should let it be known that you *seriously* think she should talk to her parents or guidance counselor. Offer to go with her if that would help or send her links to some online resources you find that might convince her. Remind her that you don't want her to do something she doesn't want to do, but at the same time, you love her and know she deserves the best.

Tell a parent or trusted adult. Yes, she may have asked you not to get involved (and usually we're totally for honoring your BFF's wishes), but if she is being physically harmed or if you are worried for her safety, it's time to get an adult involved. Don't wait until things get out of hand. If she's a real friend, she will understand in time why you had to step in and will probably even thank you.

Have you ever stood up for a friend who's being teased or bullied? Let us know what you did in the comments! 

Photo credit: Just Jared Jr..

by Amanda Tarlton | 3/22/2017