Fair Weather Friend

I have this friend (let's call her Jill). Jill was mean to me the whole summer, calling me a brat and all that stuff. Then, Friday night I found out that my dog has cancer. I told Jill and now she's all, “Oh what can I do? Are you ok?” But I know if my dog never got cancer, it would be like, “You’re a spoiled brat. Your parents buy you everything!” and stuff like that. I don't know what to do. At times she will care and other times she will just ditch me for her other friends.


Hey love,

I am sorry about your dog. A lot of people forget that pets are family and it's almost as hard to lose a beloved animal as it is to lose a relative.

As far as Jill goes, I think she means well, she just doesn’t quite understand how to be the right kind of friend. I am sure she cares about you and I think she was sincere when she told you she was sorry and asked if there was anything she could do for you. Clearly you are important to her.

However, I would speak up about the negative comments that she keeps making. Everyone is born into different stations in life, and it just happens that by luck of the draw, you were born into a more fortunate circumstance. Tell Jill that it makes you uncomfortable when she makes comments about you being spoiled. Tell her that you are lucky to have the life that you have and that her rude remarks make you feel embarrassed, which you should never feel! She may be suffering a little bit from the green-eyed monster and sees making fun of you as a way to make herself feel better. Don’t let her get to you.


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4/29/2009 7:00:00 AM