Hey, Ask Away!

The no-fail way to ask out that fox? Think outside the box—GL shows ya how.

It’s totally cool for a girl to ask a guy out—of course, you already know that. Actually doin’ it, though, can be tricky. That’s why we’re sharing our no-fail “how can he resist?” secrets for totally capturing his interest—and getting that date!
Have It Your Way

The biggest mistake most girls make is planning the potential date around him. He tells a friend he had a great time bowling with his fam Friday so, even though you are so not an alley cat, you invite him to knock over some pins. Sushi makes you gag, but he loves it, so darn it, you’re gonna suck it up and scarf that rainbow roll. Arrgghh.
Why are you selling yourself short? Plan an activity you like, first and foremost. This is crucial, because when you’re doing something that really gets you jazzed, the best parts of you show through—your enthusiasm, your sense of adventure, your fun side.
This doesn’t mean you should never take his interests to heart—it would be silly to plan a date he’d hate. But how cool will he think you are if you’re just like, “Ooh, I love the Kingda Ka at Six Flags. Have you been on it? We should go before it closes for the season.” Chances are he’ll totally dig your confident, daredevil vibe.

No Fishing Allowed

It can be tempting to try to figure out whether a guy wants to date you by running the idea past his crew. You think you’re all about the DL—his bud Tristan is your bio lab partner, so you shrug one day, “Jake’s a really nice guy. He smiled at me when you guys passed me in the hall. He did smile at me, right?” Nice try, Nancy Drew. The reality is that you’re being beyond obvious. Wearing a T-shirt that reads, “I like Jake, does he like me or what?!” would be more subtle.
Keep two things in mind: 1) Anything you say about your crush is gonna go straight back to your crush—guys gossip about this stuff just as much as girls do. 2) His friends might tell you the opposite of what’s real. If your would-be informant Tristan is a jerk, he may even encourage you to ask out Jake because he thinks it’ll be a riot when Jake says no.
So trust your girly instincts instead. If you get the impression Jake is into you (he strikes up convos with you, looks for reasons to hang in your orbit, is incredibly nice and attentive to you), then feel good about going for it.

What’s His Sign?

OK, time to seize the opportunity. Your crush is alone at the bus stop, and he waves when he sees you coming. You head over to chat him up, but the sec you open your mouth, you involuntarily bust out a goony, honking giggle.
Get your game back by striking up some solid small talk—giving him snaps for making the winning soccer goal on Saturday is a great place to start.
When you’re calmly chit-chatting, look for subtle signs that your guy is into you. Does he stand a little bit closer than he needs to? Does he rake his hands through his hair once or twice (a classic diggin’-on-a-girl move that dudes do mindlessly)? Does he look you in the eye when you talk to him, but glance down and smile a lot when he talks to you?
If so, jackpot city—his green light’s sayin’ go, but he’s trying super-hard not to be glaringly obvious.
Poppin’ the question
So how do you know when to work the convo around to the point where you ask your guy out? Let a lull form in the conversation for a sec, then…just ask!
Once you’ve thrown the big question out there, brace yourself for whatever answer he might toss back. Yeah, he could say, “No way,” so be prepared for the possibility of a letdown. If he does decline, it’s crucial not to crack. Keep your composure, smile at him and just say, “OK, that’s cool.” Then walk away.
Do not ask him to explain himself. It doesn’t matter if he likes Dakota from  drama club or is too intimidated to be seen on the dating scene or doesn’t like the way you part your hair. These are his issues, not yours. You’re a great gal with tons to offer—and a guy passing up the chance of a lifetime to hang out with you can’t even begin to touch that.
So if he says “Sure thing!”? Resist the urge to jump up and down like you just won a game-show prize. He’s a boy, not a brand-new Buick. All that’s left to do now is go out and have a blast!

OH, no she didn’t!

As I was asking my crush out, I let out a HUGE burp. When my friend asked him why he’d said no, he told her, “I hate it when girls burp out loud. It’s gross.” I lost my crush over a burp. —Summer

I left a note (or so I thought) in his locker: “Your blue eyes impact me. You are sweet and loving.” The next day, the girl whose locker is next to his said, “Sorry, I don’t feel the same for you.” —Maddie

I’d planned to ask him out at Six Flags. I ate a chili dog first, then got on the Superman. I went up to my crush, then...well, he didn’t have to ask what I had for lunch. It was all over him. —A reader

I came up with the bright idea of asking him out during swim class. But I stepped back, slipped and landed in the pool. I couldn’t even look at my crush for a week! —A reader

Just as I was going to ask him out, I tripped over my own foot and fell into the cafeteria trash can. He laughed but then stayed after lunch to help me pull food out of my hair. —A reader

Worked for me…

I caught my cutie by leaving him a note. It said, “This is a secret note, and you have to put the pieces together. If you think you know who I am, drop me a note that says, “I know it’s you.” I left him a couple of notes, and he was in all of my classes so I could watch him trying to figure out the clues. By the third note, he gave me a letter that said, “I know who you are. Let’s put the rest of the puzzle together…together.” And I never even gave him the last clue! —Kaitlyn

My first date with my BF was pathetic. We went to see a romantic movie, but it was sold out. So we went for pizza, but the place was closed. We tried for ice cream, but that was closed too. Finally, we went to his house. His little sister was there, and we wound up babysitting her for our first date. But it worked. I got to know his family, and it broke the ice. The next day, we cracked up about it. We’ve now been dating for about four months. —A reader

My crush was my best guy friend for all of eighth grade. So in reading class, we had to write sonnets. I wrote mine about a girl who has a crush on her BGF and handed it to him on the last day of school. That night, we were chatting on IM, and he told me he was going to break up with his girlfriend but not for me. But now he’s my boyfriend! —Alexis

I caught my crush’s eye just by being myself. I “accidentally” went places I knew he’d be, then I’d smile and make eye contact. He would usually come up to me and get a conversation going. One day, when he came up to me to chat, he looked really nervous. Then he asked me out! —Taylor

Over 1,000 GL girls spill their dating secrets!
What’s your perfect first-date hot spot?
28%    The homecoming dance
27%    Go-karting, full-speed ahead!
25%    Home with pizza and a movie
11%    Sushi for two at a romantic restaurant
9%    A crazy concert

It’s date night and time for the check...

35%    Halfsies all the way, all the time
32%    Whoever does the askin’ should pay
30%    The guy, of course
3%    Girls should step up...and foot the bill
Would you kiss on the first date?
52%    Yes        48% No 

By Lisa Mulcahy


7/24/2009 12:00:00 AM