You’ve seen it all over your FYP: the daily matcha and pilates mirror selfies, the daily bestie tanning seshes, the aesthetic flatlay of a passport and sunnies. Welcome to hot girl summer—or at least, the version of it that’s taken over social media.

When this trend first blew up, hot girl summer wasn’t about the looks at all. It was about finding your inner confidence, romanticizing your vacay and doing what makes you happy. But it’s gotten flipped into a whole aesthetic to chase (case in point: you’re on an epic family beach trip, and all you can worry about is which outfit will get you the most likes on Instagram) instead of a feeling to channel in your day-to-day.

So this year, we’re rewriting the rules of hot girl summer back to how they were always meant to be. After all, there’s way more to life than stressing about making everything Pinterest-worthy.

Hot Girl Summer Rule #1: Image Isn’t Everything

Be so honest: When’s the last time you did something fun without thinking about how it would look on your Instagram Story?

If you’re constantly stressing about whether your daily activities fit your social media aesthetic, you’re likely missing out on meaningful opportunities to live in the moment and connect with the people around you.

Ditch that “everything has to be perfect for my page” mindset and start making real summer memories instead. Teach your little sib a dance routine (and don’t worry about filming it). Jump in the lake/pool/ocean without worrying what your hair will look like after. Go on a sunset stroll and leave your phone at home. Try a new recipe (and don’t worry about messing up).

Moral of the story? Don’t live life trying to curate cute pics or perfect moments, or you’ll lose sight of what’s actually happening in front of you.

Hot Girl Summer Rule #2: Embrace Your Look

This time of year, there’s a lot of pressure to have the “perfect summer look”—a golden tan, sun-kissed mermaid hair, you get the idea. But tbh, that look isn’t the only one worth having.

Some girls’ skin only burns or freckles in the sun instead of tanning. Some girls’ hair will never go platinum without a serious dye job. That’s just genetics doing their thing!

So instead of chasing a social media standard that was never built for everyone (hi, $200 highlight appointment and hours in the sun), try a different approach this summer: Work *with* your natural features instead of wishing they were different—whether that’s playing up your milky complexion with a rosy blush or fully embracing your textured hair with a funky headband.

Hot Girl Summer Rule #3: Do What You Love

You’ve been wanting to try that new water polo class at the Y for *forever*, but you’re afraid your friends will think it’s stupid (until it inevitably blows up online, and then it’s suddenly OK). Or you get the urge to turn your ideas into a fantasy novel…but you don’t have a rusty typewriter or a leather-bound notebook, and it’s not raining, and you don’t have a steaming cup of peppermint tea, so today’s not the day.

If you’re letting other people or your expectations ruin things that are genuinely fun for you, you’re not going to have a very fun summer. Ignore how things look and do things that genuinely matter to Y-O-U. Because a summer spent chasing what “looks” fun? That’ll never feel as good as one spent actually having it.

Hot Girl Summer Rule #4: Real Babes Budget

Sometimes, your feed can trick you into thinking that to have a fun summer, you just *need* that new tank top, viral skincare product or expensive European vacay.

But you can still have a ton of fun staying at home in your sweats. Instead of spending all your hard-earned cash on stuff that’ll probably be out of style in a week (RIP to every skincare fridge that trended for approximately five minutes), try a few money-smart swaps instead: Thrift a pair of denim shorts instead of buying them new, or make your iced coffee at home (complete with a homemade vanilla syrup, tyvm) instead of dropping dollars at a cafe.

Wouldn’t it be better to snag that one thing you *really* want than to impulse buy everything you see once on your feed? Yeah, we think so, too.

Hot Girl Summer Rule #5: Rest is important

The hot girl summer philosophy has you thinking every second of your day needs to be filled: aesthetic 10-step morning routines, Starbies runs, weekly sleepovers and beach dates with your crush. But keeping up with that pace 24/7 is low-key exhausting.

Some of the best summer days are the ones where you absolutely nothing: sleeping in, staying in your PJs, bingeing your fave Netflix comedy from the couch. And, psst, that’s not “wasting” your summer—that’s simply giving yourself some much-deserved R&R. And that’s the hottest it gets, girl!

Read on for more wellness content:
🌅 5 Ways To Work Wellness Into Your Summer Vacay
🌅 Don’t Mind Us, Just Here To De-Influence Your Wellness Routine
🌅 Is Your Feed Messing With Your Mental Health? Try These Fixes

Images: @itsjennaraine, @solarpowered_blonde, @sarah_lutz