Dear Carol,

I’ve been having a hard time understanding my emotions as well as the way my brain works. I told my parents and my doctor that I want to be diagnosed with ADHD and anxiety, but I feel like no one understands because I’m not the hyperactive, super loud person—rather the daydreamy, distracted and creative person. My best friend has ADHD and anxiety, but now I’m starting to feel jealous of her because her mental health is diagnosed. It’s so frustrating because I feel like everyone is trying to tell me how I am, but who better understands me than me?

-Scrambled Egg Brain

Dear Scrambled Egg Brain,

Many teens are struggling to understand their emotions, and almost everyone feels anxious sometimes. If you need help, I hope you can get a diagnosis, but please hear me out: It’s possible that you don’t need a label. Maybe you’re just a complicated (and wonderful) human being. Getting to know and to accept yourself is part of the job of adolescence—figuring out who you are and how to navigate the good days and bad days. This takes time, and that’s fine. You’re a human, not a robot. If you’re mostly happy and healthy and you’re getting decent grades and have friends, then for now you’re kind of winning, right?

Carol Weston is the author of 16 books, including Girltalk, Speed of Life and Ava and Pip. Follow her on Insta @carolwestonnyc and visit carolweston.com.

More Dear Carol, right here:
🩷 “Dear Carol, I’m having trouble staying focused on schoolwork”
🩷 “Dear Carol, I don’t know how to stand up to my parents”
🩷 “Dear Carol, How do I ask for space without being rude?”