Jana K.

is modding

Tough Stuff

GIRL TALK: Safety In Numbers

About month ago I walked home from school with my friend. My friend went down one street, but I had to keep walking to get to my house. While I went down the street I heard a loud car driving really slowly, and then they opened their doors and completely stopped their car. They offered me a ride; they were about two 20-year-old men. It really scared me, and I never told anyone, because I didn’t want me parents to go off and call the police or anything. I didn't know the men. I don’t think I did the right thing at all. Now I’m paranoid of being kidnapped. What should I do? Should I have told? Is it really that big of a deal?

-paranoid-of-kidnappers

Ever hear of the saying “There’s safety in numbers”? It’s so true. Even when I’m at the mall, my mom reminds my sister and I to stay together. Listen hon, I’m not trying to scare you, but there are scary people out there and you absolutely have to be careful all the time.

You obviously did the right thing by not getting in the car with those men. But you definitely should have told someone. If you didn’t feel comfortable telling your parents, you could’ve called another relative or told one of your teachers the next day. Since you’re still feeling a little overwhelmed by the situation, it may not be a bad idea to talk to your school guidance counselor about what you’re going through. It’s totally natural to feel the way you do and no one is going to judge you.

Remember, better safe than sorry. Next time you walk home, be sure to take at least one other friend with you. If this isn’t possible, find out if you can take the bus, carpool with a friend, or have one of your relatives pick you up from school. You didn’t overreact; you did do the right thing. While, thankfully, nothing happened this time, you never know what could happen, so it’s important to be on your guard all the time.

Lots of love,

L’Oreal

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BY ANDREA T. ON 10/7/2008 3:35:00 PM 83 COMMENTS

83 READER COMMENTS

That's scary!

proudbrat10 on 10/7/2008 4:53:57 PM

When i was walking home this like 30 year old man was walking behind me so I just ran. and the next day he was sitting in a car and when I was directly across the street from him he got out of his car. and its been a year and I havent seen him since

brunettee on 10/7/2008 5:01:03 PM

oh god! my mom and i were walking to the race track once, and this creepy guy kept walking behind us really slow. thankfully, he turnedaround when he saw there were cops around! but i'll tell you one thing, it scared the crap out of me! i was looking over my shoulder for the rest of the day! thankfully, you knew what to do and didn't get in the car with those jerks [i could say something else, but it's kinda inappropriate]. but seriously, talk to someone about it, talking helps so much!

don't worry, and try to ride the bus home, cuz then you're around other all the time

`savvy

_savvygirl_15 on 10/7/2008 5:15:40 PM

omg that is freaky i would have screamed!!!!

taylorthesailor89 on 10/7/2008 5:51:29 PM

me && my friends were walking to my others friends house wen these guys screamed some inappropriate things at us from the car. It wuz pretty gross...then my friend ran to the other side of the street...now that was funny!

OHMYJENKINS on 10/7/2008 6:01:38 PM

MOD
I get really bad headaches on the 2nd day of my period is it normal?

Hey babes, all sorts of things happen when you have your period, its probably due to the hormones in your body. xo JANA

have_a_heart on 10/7/2008 6:32:52 PM

OMG! I would have freaked out! I bet you are scared! I would tell my parents! AHH! I hav never almost been kidnapped!

smileylalala on 10/7/2008 7:02:31 PM

well if you're like 12 then that's kinda creepy.
if you're 17 or something then they could just be trying to hit on you.
pff freaking college guys.. haha
but really, be careful about things like that.

[c]awkward!~ on 10/7/2008 7:04:46 PM

MOD!!
this thing sort of happned 2 me but i told the school and the school made a BIG deal out of it..im ok with that but it was a little embaresing but that happned lik 2 yrs ago and im still afraid 2 walk outside by myself..if im goin 2 my friend house which is lik a block away i pretend 2 talk on my cell phone my friends make fun of me 4 it but im soo freaked out when i see a car drive by me i run until i get where i was heading...which only makes my friends make fun of me more...how can i get over this fear

Hey babes, there is NOTHING wrong with what you are doing. Its important to ALWAYS be aware of your surroundings, although PRETENDING to talk on the phone isnt as beneficial as really talking on one. Dont let them tease you, there is nothing wrong with protecting yourself. xo JANA

moosesrockj on 10/7/2008 7:10:47 PM

that is sooooooooo scary. I would probably say some uh... 'bad' words at them then run as fast as i could (which is pretty fast when i try). If they followed me I'd run into a store or something. They can't get you in there! But you did the right thing. Tell someone though you don't want someone actually getting in a car with them!

hazel_hottie on 10/7/2008 7:31:49 PM

i would have ran as fast as i could...AH thats scary. I think you totally did the right thing by not getting in the car! But like...i think that you should probably tell someone! sorry! lol

tennischick524 on 10/7/2008 7:44:12 PM

i woulve like screamed no really loud and then been like "STRANGER DANGER!!!!!!!" if they wouldbve come near me i wouldve smcked them.....seriously

mrs.kevinjonas on 10/7/2008 8:06:09 PM

MOD~
I'm having my first Co-ed birthday party since I was 5 and I don't know what type of games and activities to do because guys will be there too. Do you have any suggestions?
Also, I want to invite my crush to the party. We've been talking and hanging out for two or three weeks, would it be awkward for him to receive an invitation from me?

Hey babes, you cant go wrong with popping in a movie. You could also try actually doing something for your party, like a haunted hay ride or rent out a skating rink. xo JANA

Peach Blossom on 10/7/2008 8:19:48 PM

Same with me, except no creepy people stopping their cars lol. I walk a few more blocks then my friend alone. Nothing really happens in my town. I even have to walk home at 9 at night and it's all dark and I'm alone sometimes. My friends always say "It's not like your gonna get kidnapped" But it's just more fun and safe to walk with someonelse. Well once this man asked me if I had a pen as I was walking home and I got soo scared because it was just the two of us. I thought I was gonna die or something lol! I said "Uh no sorry" and walked away. I even walked in the wrong direction so he wouldn't know where I lived. hehh

MunkQoo on 10/7/2008 8:22:18 PM

for you b-day party my advise would be to go ahead and invite ur crush. i'm sure if u didnt and he found out guys were allowed to come to he would be hurt. also u should try dancing. u can never go wrong with music. send around a sheet or something for music requests b4 the party.
kk4kora

kora on 10/7/2008 8:35:40 PM

Mod. I need some advice on what to do. My friends and i sent a letter to the principal asking for a school dance, and today he called us to the office and said that middle school dances were against the policy. But he said we could do something else this year. What do you think would be a good idea for a school get together? <3 Inky

Hey girlie, is there anyway you could do a movie showing? Put on a movie in the auditorium and get everyone to go. xo JANA

Inky on 10/7/2008 8:39:57 PM

Thanks Jana. I just had another idea, do you think it would be to hard to do a carnival kind of thing?

Inky on 10/7/2008 8:55:33 PM

GUESS WHAT!!!??!!! do u guys know the movie soccer mom, the one with emily osment, the one that girlslife has been putting trailers ever where!!!! well, i girl that went to my school last year (she's a sophmore now) was asked to be in the movie cuz she's so good!! so she plays one of the soccer players!! her name is iris ummmm i forgot her last name but ill post it later!!! but its sooo kool to think that a girl from city is in a movie!!!! and she went to my school!!!

luv2recycle on 10/7/2008 9:08:04 PM

that happened to me one time!!sorta.
so my friend and I were at her house when we were 9 it was a pretty safe neighborhood so we took her dog 4 a walk alone. the sun was setting and I turned around and saw a car slowly following us. so i told my friend she turned around and both of us started to run. We were out of breath and as pale as ghosts wen we got back to her house

someswimmer on 10/7/2008 9:36:40 PM

ugh that sort of happened to me except i was at the mall, my mom was in another store and this guy was following me around and giving me these creepy smiles! i ran and ducked in a random store and then speed-walked out because he could see me. THANK GOD he didnt follow me after i walked out of the store

label-free♥ on 10/7/2008 9:38:03 PM

Same thing happened to me when I was riding my bike in the rain. I just kept peddling and went up some yards where they couldn't follow me!

Lexy5 on 10/7/2008 10:15:39 PM

hey if you ever feel scared like that or anything grab your cell phone and just talk and be like..." ya dad, oh you are around the corner ok ill be right there..." that's what i did once and totally works!!!

jordie<3 on 10/7/2008 10:48:14 PM

~~~MOD~~~
how complicated would it be to get back with an exboyfriend?? we broke up in june, only because we were going to different high schools. we still email and stuff...so ya
xoxo

goldilocks on 10/8/2008 1:02:27 AM

omg last year this man in a white suv tried kid-naping a first grade girl and her kindergarten brother at one of our elementary schools. my friend was on safety patrol for the next week and was freaked out. they never found the man but what happened was it was right before class started so most people were inside the girl and her brother were walking to school and this guy pulled up and causualy asked for directions the kids came up and right before the guy opened the door a car behind him hoked and the guy sped off. it was mega scary.

gymnastgurl67 on 10/8/2008 7:14:31 AM

that would be SOOO freaky!!! but i think they just saw you walking alone, and thought you would fall for thier stupid trick, but when it didnt work they probably just forgot about you. If you think about it, they dont know anything about you or even who you are! I wouldnt worry, you made a good decision!

ilovesoccerballs on 10/8/2008 3:37:45 PM

ohh scary! over the summer when i go to the summer house, i always go on walks just after dinner. There aren't that many creepy people down there, but i have seen a few. if you're walking through a park/beach or something, just stand nearby a non-creepy adult. or even better, take out your cell phone and walk the rest of the way while pretending to talk on it.

stagebabe401 on 10/8/2008 3:40:30 PM

hey guys, do you see my avatar? i uploaded it but it's not showing up for me. so can you tell me if you see it? thanks

sparky4me on 10/8/2008 4:03:50 PM

okay, im in 7th grade have pubic hair(and trust me not just a little) and i havent gotten my period yet. i way about 120lbs. does weight have to do with y imnot getting my period

live2mkplplaugh on 10/8/2008 4:32:36 PM

omg!those kinds of things are like soo scary.i feel bad for you girls,but its life.
-craziogymnast

craziogymnast on 10/8/2008 5:01:56 PM

MOD
ok this is weird and REALLY embarrising but lately my boobs hurt like CRAZY and at skewl today i got this weird sensation i wet myself sorta BUT I DIDNT!! can you please tell me whats up with that?

hey babes, your breasts are muscles, they have tissue in them, you may be having a growth spurt which could cause tenderness. As for the wetness, it sounds like normal run of the mill discharge. xo JANA

dancergirl2232 on 10/8/2008 5:15:51 PM

omg so scary sorry babe!!!!

megabegabyte on 10/8/2008 5:28:34 PM

If that was me I would have slugged one in the face and not showed any fear. Guys are like that sometimes, total jerks (hint: little brother.). I have been obsessed w/ being safe. Don't worry.

fungirl158 on 10/8/2008 6:06:26 PM

CHECK OUT MY PROFILE AND LEAVE COMMENT!!! =)

,
shopper_babe

shopper_babe on 10/8/2008 6:32:15 PM

Omg, i would have been soooooooo scared,but don't call me a crybaby, but I would have ran as fast as I could crying ALL the way home!!!

Yes, i know that sounds like the nursery rhyme

*3doorsdown*

3doorsdown on 10/8/2008 7:10:26 PM

~MOD MOD MOD~
ok i have a biiiiiiig prob. well, actually, it's my friend's prob. her mom is making her life miserable. even though my friend is at a perfectly healthy weight, her mom tells her she's fat. she doesnt trust my friend, even though my friend is a good person and always tells the truth.her mom is irrational and unfair. my friend's parents divorced about 4 years ago and her mom has primary custody, so she has to deal with this most of the time. she tried to talk to her mom and make her understand, but her mom won't listen.

Hey babes, clearly she cant do this on her own. Tell her she needs to talk to a counselor. They WILL help. I was at my counselor probably once a week sorting stuff out. Even if the counselor doesnt step in , it helps to have an adult sounding board to help your friend see things in a different light. xo JANA

xeoa on 10/8/2008 7:39:21 PM

I've had my first look at a kidnapper a few weeks ago with my Grandma, and this is what happened:
So we were at Wal-Mart getting some storage bins when I look up and see this fat guy holding a DVD acting like he's looking at it but he's looking at a lot of children. At first I thought he might be a guard watching to make sure the kids don't steel anything, but these 2 girls walked by with their mom (they were about 7). He stared at them with a smile but when the mom looked up he looked at the DVD. They walked down a isle and the guy put the DVD down aqnd went in the isle. Those family stores can't ALWAYS be safe, ya know. These are my easy steps to NOT being kidnapped:
1. if a unknown person grabs you, kick them in their private and when they're bent down hit your knee to they're face. I heard that's a total knock out.
2. If a car/unknown person follows you, TELL A PARENT OR NEIGHBOR YOU KNOW! If no one is around, act like you're talking on the phone or hide. And never walk right home, beacause if so, they know where ya live!
3. Ask your 'rents if they can start picking you up at school or walking you home. If you're somewhere else, be with an parent/guardian at all times.
Play safe online, too and never go on chat rooms!
Hopes and Hugs,
Picture This!

Picture This! on 10/8/2008 7:50:50 PM

MOD and girls
my crush oscar is very confusing.last week he liked me.he kept flirting and he asked me to go to the movies wit him.this monday his friend told me that he wanted to ask another girl out in lunch.and then oscar stopped liking me.but then on tuesday he liked
me again.and on tuesday he ignored me during lunch
and today i found out that he only likes me as a friend and he was flirting with this girl in geography class.right in front of me!!!.help!!!!

Hey babes, he sounds too finicky, stop wasting your time on him, any relationship with him is going to be ful lof unneeded dramz. xo JANA

Kimm23 on 10/8/2008 8:03:27 PM

happens all the time at my school. you can't really escape it. =(

I've almost gotten raped several times.

CHECK OUT MY PROFILE PEOPLE!!!!!!!!!!!

writerchickwithfeelings on 10/8/2008 8:06:46 PM

thanks jana

Kimm23 on 10/8/2008 8:07:55 PM

I get really scared when I am walking to my house by myself there was this one day this dude stopped his car so I ran all the way to my house. It was creepy.

LuLU73 on 10/8/2008 8:16:36 PM

A woman I know was out in public somewhere and this guy was taking pictures of her kids with camera cell phone!

Somebody on 10/8/2008 8:22:00 PM

MOD
i have a question/problem. ive been dating my bf for about 2 months now and things are going great.i couldnt be happier. the thing is, i have a guy friend who sits in front of me in math. we were friends in elementary but he went to a different middle school but now we go to the same high school. about a week or 2 ago he told me that hes liked me since the beginning of the year and still likes me. hes brought that up a couple times in the past few weeks. do you think hes trying to get me to break up with my bf? thats not an option b/c hes not my type and i dont see him more as a friend and i reallly like my bf. what should i do if he keeps bringing it up? it puts me in a really awkward position...

:] on 10/8/2008 8:50:06 PM

One time, I was walking back from the grocery store with my mom after dark. There was this one guy who stopped by us and asked for directions. His grandma just died and he was heading to the funeral. Then, this one woman turned around her car, pulled down her window, and asked us if we are okay. Don't you think that is responsible?! I think that was a very nice thing to do.

mngirl on 10/8/2008 8:58:43 PM

***MOD***

How are you girls?

mngirl on 10/8/2008 8:59:59 PM

Check out my profile!

girscouts2664 on 10/8/2008 9:17:34 PM

is there a mod on? i have a question. i posted it a little while ago but i havent seen it up. should i repost it again?

:] on 10/8/2008 9:19:13 PM

MOD CAN YOU PLLEEEEASE ANSWER?????
i have a question/problem. ive been dating my bf for about 2 months now and things are going great.i couldnt be happier. the thing is, i have a guy friend who sits in front of me in math. we were friends in elementary but he went to a different middle school but now we go to the same high school. about a week or 2 ago he told me that hes liked me since the beginning of the year and still likes me. hes brought that up a couple times in the past few weeks. do you think hes trying to get me to break up with my bf? thats not an option b/c hes not my type and i dont see him more as a friend and i reallly like my bf. what should i do if he keeps bringing it up? it puts me in a really awkward position...

You're just going to have to be upfront with him about it. If he mentions it again, just tell him that you like your boyfriend. -lauren

:] on 10/8/2008 9:30:43 PM

that is scary! that made me think of 2 stories. one day i was with my 2 friends and my friends mom and it was late. we might have looked older but these guys(who looked about in their early 20s) in a car slowed down and said "hey ladies." her mom said to keep driving 'cause we were minors ad he said "even better"(sicko!) and she flipped out on him and started cussing at them and saying if they didn't leave she was gonna kick their "butts" and they drove off really fast!lol i'm so glad she was with us! my other story is short but me my friend and my little brother rode our bikes to a store one day that is like a half a mile from my house. and when we were going to leave we saw these guys standing by the bus stop next to the store and they were staring at us and we got freaked out and waited for a little while till the bus came and once those guys left we biked as fast as we could home..oh and you did the right thing and you can never be two careful...

Jenster on 10/8/2008 11:23:38 PM

Randomness I <3 Edward Cullen

swimmerxox on 10/9/2008 8:56:18 AM

wow you guys must have been really scared. i dont have a story about me being kidnapped but when my mom was like 16 (and she was very short for her age) this guy was in her neighborhood and he asked her for directions. then e tried to grab her arm but she ran into her neighbors house and they called the police but he never gt caught. oh yeah and one time my mom and my sisters and i were driving into my neighborhood and there was this guy and he was following us so my mom just went out of the neighborhood and then he stopped following us. CREEPY!

srmthgfan01 on 10/9/2008 2:14:35 PM

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