Jana K.

is modding

The Problem is Me!

GIRL TALK: Flirt-A-Holic

Okay so I LOVE to flirt!! I flirt with boys next to me in class, in the halls, and even at the store! I can’t help it. It’s just when I see a guy it’s a reflex to flirt with him. My friend has a really nice boyfriend and I’m starting to like him! I know it’s horrible and I hate liking him but I can’t help it! She been such a great friend to me and I can’t thank her enough...it’s just I really like this guy and I don’t want it to ruin our friendship. How do I stop this nonsense before it ruins our friendship???

XOXO,
Boycrazy

There’s nothing wrong with flirting. It’s kind of like chocolate—great in moderation, but too much is never a good thing. But Girl Rule #1 dictates you should never, EVER flirt with a friend’s crush, boyfriend, or ex-boyfriend.

Let’s start at the beginning. Why do you like your friend’s boyfriend? Make a list of these qualities and look for them in other guys. Think you’re just into your friend’s BF because you can’t have him? That’s not a good reason and you know it.

Do you really want to ruin a great friendship and lose a great friend over some boy? Trust me on this one: no guy is ever worth losing your girls. How would you feel if your friend was flirting with your boyfriend? Not so great, huh? Show your girl some respect and remember her BF is off-limits.

The fact that you even considered your friend’s feelings shows you’re a great friend as well. Remember, it’s okay to flirt, but that doesn’t mean you should flirt with everyone. Boyfriends come and go, but great girl friends last a lifetime.

Lots of love,

L’Oreal

ARE YOU THE ONE CAUSING ALL THE DRAMA? CLICK HERE to submit your own problem to be answered on Girl Talk!

BY ANDREA T. ON 9/29/2008 5:36:00 PM 50 COMMENTS

50 READER COMMENTS

check out my profile!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

coca08 on 9/29/2008 6:51:55 PM

First comment! Great advice L'Oreal!

BurninUp_1233 on 9/29/2008 6:52:04 PM

I used to be a big flirt too! Not anymore though. I've got it all under wraps. But, I totally get what you're saying, like when you see a boy you just go into over drive and start biting your lip and flipping your hair all out! I like one of my friend's crushes... but I'm not saying anything, because I know that my crush is like a brother to me, and treats me like a sister... but my friend is HIS crush (and I don't know if I am or not). So it's best to just not get in the way. Just let it be, and be happy for your friend. Even though it kills you.... :-(

Lexy5 on 9/29/2008 7:03:55 PM

CHECK OUT MY PROFILE! IT JUST GOT PUT UP AND I WANT TO SEE WHAT YOUR GIRLIES THINK OF IT!

BurninUp_1233 on 9/29/2008 7:04:13 PM

i have the exact opposite problem!!!! i like this one guy, and i want to become friends with him, and i know that if he knew me better he would want to be friends with me too, but im so shy and i dont know what to talk to him about. i mean, today he gave me a hi five cuz we both have an a in science and we sit next to eachother in science. what should i talk to him about without sounding obvious that i want to know him better????

luv2recycle on 9/29/2008 7:11:23 PM

yupp

love wanted on 9/29/2008 7:14:02 PM

haha. don't worry girl, my friend has the same problem.

xoxoMary on 9/29/2008 7:16:27 PM

***MOD***

ok there is this guy his name is matt aand these are the i think he likes me are these sighs comes up to me and thikcals (sorry for spelling) and says hey girl in the hall and today he made a joke no on really heard only me and my friend and i laghed he made like a smile with no teeth and the some parts of class we just stared in each others eyes do you think he likes me

-Glitter

2glitter12 on 9/29/2008 7:22:47 PM

ahhh! tht is the same way with me! i have guys tell me all the time "ur funn to flirt with" but im tired of all the flirting i want to flirt with a guy who i actually have feelings for and he would like me back. wut should i do? and write backs? help me im in a crisis! kinda. lol.

noowayyitskori on 9/29/2008 7:28:26 PM

MOd!!! or girlies
This morning my face, like, totally broke out, and every night i do a face cleanser. Do you think its stress related? I also can't fall asleep at night. It takes me like an hour to fall asleep. Any idea? Plus, (sorry there's soooo much) I have a guy friend and I'm starting to like hime more and more. And I think he likes me too, like we talk in Art A LOT, I mean ALOT!!! I kind-of joke around with him too. Finally, (ITS THE LAST THING I PROMISE!!!!) this kid at school is sooooo annoying! He, like, torochers me! He never done it before this year and its like to the extreme. HELP ME!!!!

GuitarGurl48 on 9/29/2008 7:35:26 PM

Just consider which is more valuable to u- ur crush on this guy, or your friendship? Remind yourself that if you cant help liking him, then thats why your friend likes him so much, and then tell yourself what great taste she has, so its no wonder she selected him. finally, remind urself of how valuable ur friendship is and how you wouldnt tear it apart for anything! and honestly, if u broke off ur friendship and dated him, how long would the relationship last? once it was over, u wouldnt have ur girl or the guy.

Dream_of_dance123 on 9/29/2008 7:40:57 PM

MOD
I really like my BFF's boyfriend. I've always liked him since I was like, 5 (I'm not kidding!) and now that she's dating him, I feel like a third wheel around them. My other BFf also has a BF and it's them, with their boyfriends always hanging around and then there's me. Can you help me get rid of this crush on my BFF's BF?!? Or at least, keep it under wraps??

charlottecutie12 on 9/29/2008 7:45:04 PM

luv2recycle--
just talk o him like you're trying to be friends witha girl (just dont talk to him about, you know, lip gloss and stuff. maybe talk about the football game tonight, or a cool new song you heard.) hope i helped!!
*MKO*

luv2shop112 on 9/29/2008 8:16:49 PM

****Workout Quiz****Please take!*

1.how many push-ups can you do? 10
2.how many sit-ups/crunches can you do? 50
3.how many miles can you run/jog? ummm 0 lol
4.what's your fav workout routine? hmmm
5.can you do your splits all the way? almost
6.what's your skincare routine? cleanse, tone, moisturize
7.what's your fav song for when you workout? idk i have alot
8.would you prefer a treadmeal(sorry 4 da spelling) or the outdoors? probably outdoors
9.what weather do you prefer if you like to jog outside? hot and stickey (easier to breathe)
10. Give a workout tip or skincare tip~ when doing push-ups, do 2 sets e.g. do 10, and then after a minute do another 5 or so

Hope you guys like it I'm trying to see if what routine you do is similar to mine!

Born2Ride on 9/29/2008 8:52:50 PM

i don't think that it's a problem that you flirt with tons of guys, but it's definitely a problem to like your BFF's BF. just don't pay attention to him in that way, and think about other cute/hot guys that you can have a crush on!

~cami-chic

cami-chic on 9/29/2008 8:56:48 PM

MODERATOR:
okay so i sit next to this guy in lit. and language, and he constantly flirts with me and today when i went to my volleyball game, he was there for football and when he saw me he was checking me out. he sooo sweet!! do you think he likes me????

Yes! L

mrs.kevinjonas on 9/29/2008 9:05:08 PM

*MOD*

Yea, I have the same problem as luv2recycle, how do you try to talk to guys without being obvious that you want to?

Thx

turtlegirl2222 on 9/29/2008 9:06:02 PM

I can't flirt at all

chocolatelover423 on 9/29/2008 9:15:48 PM

***MOD***
Is it bad if you are friends with your friends crush and you hug them and are just their friend? Also what if you both started liking the person at the same time, and he's not allowed to date anyways? I mean if he EVER asked me out (he NEBVER WILL) I would say no because I know how much my friend likes him, but I mean it makes me feel good when I can actually talk to hi and stuff and its not like I can control who I like! Right? Well please answer!

I think you should try to keep your distance because your friendship with your girl friend is more important. L

M1sspink135 on 9/29/2008 9:21:43 PM

Ok i am not trying to be rude but girls don't like girls that flirt all the time at least that is how it is at my school just think befor you say some thing do you really like the guy or did you just kind of notice him if you think it will help

sosierox on 9/29/2008 9:27:15 PM

1. like 20 i think
2.65
3. 2 1/2
4. run a half mile, lift weights, do arm curls, ab workouts then run a mile and half and then walk 1/4 mile, you have a killer burn, it is the best feelin in the world!!!!!!!
5. psh no
6.exfoliate, cleanse, tone
7.so what by pink
8. treadmeal (if they have fans)
9. early in the morning when u can still feel the moisture in the air but not so cold u have 2 wear a lot of layers
10.make sure you dont push your self 2 hard, if you do u will overwork and exhaust urself, start slow and then gradually go up (it works a lot better on your body)
and i would love 2 work out with you some day lol

basketball_luver#44 on 9/29/2008 10:12:02 PM

MOD*MOD*MOD please help!!
ok so i have a lot of guy friends, i all call them my 'brothers' and are really close to them. the problem is, everytime i get close to a guy [as friends] they always end up likeing me, making it soo awkward to be around them and then it ruins our friendship! and its the same with EVERY guy. ughh its so anoying! what can i do so my guy friends dont like me?? thank you so much!! :]

don't let it ruin the friendship. It won't ruin the friendship if you don't allow it to. L

itss_ginaa! on 9/29/2008 10:14:10 PM

1.how many push-ups can you do? uh, 25. I think I could do more, but not many more
2.how many sit-ups/crunches can you do? 75
3.how many miles can you run/jog? 8 (on a good day)
4.what's your fav workout routine? umm... a run, and then circuit (crunches, pushups, plank...)
5.can you do your splits all the way? not quite... not even close, lol!
6.what's your skincare routine? wash it with warm water and rinse with cold. then put "on-the-spot" cream on any zits that I have.
7.what's your fav song for when you workout? I have a lot, uh, my recent favorite is "paralyzer" by finger eleven
8.would you prefer a treadmeal(sorry 4 da spelling) or the outdoors? outdoors
9.what weather do you prefer if you like to jog outside? cloudy or sunny with a cool breeze
10. Give a workout tip or skincare tip~uh, idk. just listen to urself. don't do something just cuz someone else does. u don't have to keep pace with anyone else (talking about running now), just keep ur own pace.

M... on 9/29/2008 10:14:41 PM

MOD!!!!!!!!!!!! OR CHICKAS!

I LIKE ONE OF MY GUY FRIENDS AND HE SAID HE LIKED ME TOO AND SO IT WAS GOOD. WE DIDN'T DO ANYTHING YOU KNOW LIKE BF GF STUFF. THEN I SEE HIM KISS MY BFF. WE AREN'T FRIENDS ANYMORE, BUT I STILL LIKE MY EX GUY FRIEND!! WHAT SHOULD I DO??? THX

Cutiepie445 on 9/29/2008 10:28:09 PM

****Workout Quiz****Please take!*

1.how many push-ups can you do? Guy push-ups 30
Girl push-ups 55

2.how many sit-ups/crunches can you do? 55

3.how many miles can you run/jog? Jog... 1 mile.

4.what's your fav workout routine? Dancing or jumping rope!

5.can you do your splits all the way? I used to, but in the last year I quit my sports to work on my music... so not anymore.... but almost.

6.what's your skincare routine? I have oily skin, so I try to just wash my face and leave it alone.

7.what's your fav song for when you workout? Anything upbeat. Like Demi Lovato's new CD, or Aly and AJ.

8.would you prefer a treadmeal(sorry 4 da spelling) or the outdoors? Outdoors

9.what weather do you prefer if you like to jog outside? Cold. Not like when you breathe piercing cold, but enough for a lightweight jacket that's comforbale to run around in.

10. Give a workout tip or skincare tip ~ If you have oily skin, use two different face washes. One intense, and one light... take turns using the two so you don't dry your face out, but you also get your natural oils in there.

Lexy5 on 9/29/2008 10:54:11 PM

1.how many push-ups can you do? 25
2.how many sit-ups/crunches can you do? 150
3.how many miles can you run/jog? 2
4.what's your fav workout routine? sprinting and bleachers(running up and down bleachers)
5.can you do your splits all the way no way! 6.what's your skincare routine? idk use soap? 7.what's your fav song for when you workout? i don't listen to music while i work out sorry!8.would you prefer a treadmeal(sorry 4 da spelling) or the outdoors? outdoors
9.what weather do you prefer if you like to jog outside? hot and dry
10. Give a workout tip or skincare tip~ wash ur face twice a day

mairyfairy25 on 9/29/2008 11:03:15 PM

lol i love to flirt! it's fun!

mairyfairy25 on 9/29/2008 11:04:22 PM

cutiepie445
ask him what was up with the lip action with ur bff..if it's a stupid reason then don't like him(i know easier said then done!!!)

mairyfairy25 on 9/29/2008 11:40:12 PM

what is modding???
and when you send advice how do you receive the mail?

kangyaroo on 9/29/2008 11:50:23 PM

1.how many push-ups can you do? 50
2.how many sit-ups/crunches can you do? 50
3.how many miles can you run/jog? probably 1
4.what's your fav workout routine? 'five fab exersizes'
5.can you do your splits all the way kinda 6.what's your skincare routine? wash,put some clean and clear stuff on[idk wat its called]and cream
7.what's your fav song for when you workout? any boys like girls songg!
8.would you prefer a treadmeal(sorry for the spelling) bothh! well outdoors in good weather but like winter and stuff treadmeal
9.what weather do you prefer if you like to jog outside? sunny and breeze
10. Give a workout tip or skincare tip-wash your face with cold waterr

itss_ginaa! on 9/30/2008 9:54:15 AM

GUITARGURL48-- i'm here to help!!

1.your face might just be braking out cuz it happens to everyone [me too!]. some of it might be stress related,since it seams like you have a lot of prblems in your life!
2. i had the same prblem! it took me forever to fall alsleep when i was in like 4th grade. my mom didnt let me take anything [she thought i was lying] but i just grew out of it after a little while.
3. good luck with your guy!!
4. ughh i know how you feel. theres this kid sean whos on my bus and in some of my classes and he is SO anoying!! him and his friend are ALWAYS throwing stuff at me and my friends or calling us names or hitting us. ughhh! i just ignore it and keep my self busy texting on my phone. hopefully it will go away, but dont let them show you that they bother you becuase they just want you to get mad.

itss_ginaa! on 9/30/2008 10:10:59 AM

hey ppl

1.how many push-ups can you do? 40

2.how many sit-ups/crunches can you do? 60

3.how many miles can you run/jog? 2

4.what's your fav workout routine? karate

5.can you do your splits all the way? NO! lol

6.what's your skincare routine? i wash my face twice a day with the Neutrogena Wave and every once in a while i use a special face lotion

7.what's your fav song for when you workout? Hook It Up!

8.would you prefer a treadmill or the outdoors? Outdoors no question

9.what weather do you prefer if you like to jog outside? About 60 degrees with a breeze is perfect for me

10. Give a workout tip or skincare tip~ go for a jog every day

sparky4me on 9/30/2008 12:42:23 PM

Mod i'm so stressed ever since school started. Everyday I wake up at 5:45 and go to school and right after i go to cross country, tuesdays are our meets, and half in hour later i go to dance twice a week and have to do my hw and shower, eat and get ready to do it all over again! I hate this cycle and have NO time to do anything! I already suffered a meltdown and manage to get almost 9 hours of sleep and are in 3 honors classes and am getting c's in most of my classes so far, which is HORRIBLE to what i can really do, i get all a's in everything but math, but idc. I know that i should consider limiting my activities but i don't want to. Please help!

Hey Girl,

I know it is tough, I have alot of stuff to and no free time. The best thing to do is to map out your time and stick to a schedule. Try and cut out wasted time until you get caught up. You can do it just put your head down and keep chugging along! Good Luck!

-Kyle

SouljaGirl22 on 9/30/2008 2:54:50 PM

**MOD***
In the last two years i went threw a total change..like i got a lot taller and skinner and prettier.Everybody has been telling me this. But whenever my friends will be like he was checking you out or soandso said this i dont totally believe them and they always tell me i need more confidence.How can i be more confident??

Hold your head high and think highly of yourself and give yourself some credit. Don't be so dependent on what other people say know that you are awesome!

-Kyle

xoitssewxo on 9/30/2008 3:12:54 PM

1. as many as i want, although i generally dont want to do em!
2.250 about ( we do a ton in dance class im not lying!
3. 1 (not good w/ long distance stuff
4.does dance count?
5.im worken on it!
6.idk
7.idk
8.outdoors as long as i'm w/ friends
9. cool weather (no sweaty wheather ick!)
10. for crunches do em to a fast paced song. do eight half time, 16 double time, then put your legs in straddle 8 half time 16 double time then angle them 8 half time, 16 double time. then do 16 100's (legs strait up and lift body up to legs w/ arms)

ginnykinz on 9/30/2008 3:14:25 PM

**MOD**
So there is this guy on my bus(that used to like me in 2nd grade now we're in 8th) that i think likes me cause on friday he stole my gum but just like messing around than yesterday he was can i have a piece of gum and i was like nope i dont have any then he sat in my seat and was keep asking me to give him a piece so i finally did and he was like love you and he sat back in his seat then he sat with me again and was talking to his friend then his friend texted me and was like do you like "him"?MOD do you think he likes me? And if he does what should i do?!?!PleaseHelp!

xoitssewxo on 9/30/2008 3:22:49 PM

****MOD AND GIRLS***
ok sooo i usually have nbo problems being relaxed and even flirting with guys i like, but this time its different, i just CANT relax around him!! well like i can relax, but i cant flirt i get too tongue tied. i think part of the problem is that he's like my older brother's good friend and my bro told him that i hate him but i dont?? (obviously) and my bro always humiliates me in front of his friends too what do i do?? <333

lilangel08 on 9/30/2008 4:04:20 PM

MOD im having serious issues. last week, all this drama went on. i broke up with my bf cause he was being a jerk and i didnt really want to go out with him anymore. and i kinna liked his bff. well, everyone found out that i liked his bff and everyone said i broke up with him for his bestie which isnt true. my ex, friends, and the whole grade was mad. then one day, everyone got over it. i talked to everyone and even my ex forgave me.i guess i thought i still liked my ex and i told him. well, he said that he still liked me and so he asked me out. i said yes and that was friday. now on tuesday, i want to break up. hes aggravating me, and acting really immature. but i dont want to break up with him cause it would crush him and i already have this reputation for acting like this. should i just act all weird around him and not talk to him to get him to break up with me or what? i seriously need help!

hey babes, trust your gut, if you broke up with him the first time, its probably true that you didnt like him. Dont date him because you dont want to be on your own. Who cares what everyone thinks? They have NO right to judge you, the only person that can judge you is your bf. You have to be true to yourself, by staying with him you are lying to him. Just say, I made a mistake when i said, i was confused and upset and missing you but that isnt a reason to stay with someone. xo JANA

lilybelle00 on 9/30/2008 5:07:07 PM

MOD MOD MOD MOD

*it's my birthday!!!*
okay..anyway..sorry, i was just excited

Dear MOD please help! i really want a boyfriend. i like this guy who likes me and i want to go out. but my dad will NOT have anything to do with it! what should i do? should i just lie or should i just wait until my dad says it's okay for me to date? and why are dads so overprotective???
thanks!!
emily

emily96 on 9/30/2008 5:26:52 PM

i WISH i could flirt for fun! the guy i like is totally flirting wit hthis other girl, and if he likes her, i'm not getting in the way of it. -sighs-

1.how many push-ups can you do? NO IDEA. 15?

2.how many sit-ups/crunches can you do? 25

3.how many miles can you run/jog? 1 AND 1/2. ITS
OUR WARM UP FOR GYM

4.what's your fav workout routine? SKIING

5.can you do your splits all the way? HECK NO!

6.what's your skincare routine? WASH W/ SOAP AND WARM WATER, TONER/CLEANSER, A BIT OF LOTION

7.what's your fav song for when you workout? SOMETHING UP-BEAT

8.would you prefer a treadmill or the outdoors? OUTDOORS. UNLESS IT'S CRAPPY, THEN THE TREADMILL

9.what weather do you prefer if you like to jog outside? COOL AND A BIT DRY, CUZ OTHERWISE MY CLOTHES STICK TO ME

10. Give a workout tip or skincare tip~ WHEN WASHING YOUR FACE, GO IN SMALL CIRCLES TO GET MORE DEAD SKIN CELLS OFF, AND THEN BLOT DRY. FOR EXERCISE, DO BUILDS WHEN RUNNING/JOGGING [IE, START SLOW AND THEN BUILD UP SPEED]

_savvygirl_15 on 9/30/2008 5:59:56 PM

emily96,
this is a question for the Date Ball!!!!!!!!!!!1

Should emily96 lie to her dad about dating guys?

Date Ball says: I'm cool with that

I say: I have to say i agree with the Date Ball.talk to ur mom about it!

coca08 on 9/30/2008 10:58:47 PM

I wouldn't lie to my dad i just wouldn't tell him and then i would have my mom tell him so he wouldn't freak out i know it's childish, but i'm only 13.

aquamouse on 10/1/2008 2:06:17 PM

OMG i have those SAME EXACT SUNGLASSES!!!! no way no way! lol

holapeeps on 10/1/2008 3:42:06 PM

OMG! that's kinda like me,except it's my bff's crush...i really don't wanna make her mad,but i'm just so much better at flirting than she is,and it's the first dude she's ever liked!and now every time i talk about him,she pinches me!it just makes me kinda mad!

nirvanaluver on 10/1/2008 4:21:38 PM

emily96:

if your dad doesn't want you to date, you have to respect that. if you don't respect it, he'll lose trust in you, and that won't get you anywhere. try to compromise; what about group dates? or dates that have adults around?

_savvygirl_15 on 10/1/2008 5:42:47 PM

lilangel08:

don't think aboutwhat your brother tells his friends about you. if you don't know he tells embarrassing stuff about you, give him the benefit of the doubt. it's totally normal to gettongue-tied, i mean, i can't talk to guys that are "jocks" or whatever [though i'm getting better at it! ] it just takes time. if he's kinda a stranger to you [other than him being your bro's bestie], than try to get some info on his interests.

_savvygirl_15 on 10/1/2008 5:46:30 PM