How to deal with the dreaded "friend guilt"
You love your friends more than *anything* and you try your best to always be there for them—but sometimes, life just gets in the way. We have all been there, whether you have to cancel plans because you don’t feel well or just need some time alone, "friend guilt" takes over your head and makes you feel awful. It even makes you think that you are a horrible friend...but you shouldn't feel that way. Below are some of the most common causes of gal pal guilt and how to avoid it.
Forgetting a friend's birthday: As bad as it sounds, it happens to the best of us. We don’t remember what day it is or we might be so busy with school and homework that we just simply forget. The best way to deal with it is to sincerely apologize and make up for it—send them a cute care package or throw them a belated surprise party. Make them feel special (and make sure you set a reminder for next year!).
Cancelling last minute: All plans do not always go, well, as planned. Sometimes things come up from being sick to being overwhelmed by studying for finals and may interfere with dinner or the ice cream date that you made with your friends. But the thought of cancelling the plans has you feeling super guilty. The best way to cope with this is to put yourself first and be honest with your friend. Tell them exactly why you have to cancel, and be polite about it. Then ask for a raincheck, and stick to it.
Spending time with other friends: If all of your friends don't get along or if you have friends from all different groups (like some from church and some from soccer), you might have to hang out with them at different times. Do not let one group of friends make you feel guilty about not be able to hang out with them because you have plans with someone else! It's always a good idea to spend time with different people but make sure you aren't completely ditching your bestie for someone else. Schedule time with everyone—like lunch with your drama club girls this week and shopping with your BFF on Saturday.
No matter the situation, do not feel guilty about putting yourself first and remember that you *cannot* always please everyone. True friends will understand you and accept you for who you are, as long as you're open and honest with them.
What sitches make you feel most guilty when it comes to your besties? Let us know in the comments!
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